Page 19 of Clan and Crave

“Yeah. But what if they aren’t ready? Myfather Vel is crazy protective. What if he won’t let me leave?How’s an orderly going to stop him from making me stay?”

Hupsan didn’t remark on Conyod’s risingvoice. “I don’t believe Nobek Vel will behave in such a way. Evenif he does, your Dramok and Imdiko fathers won’t allow him to breakthe guidelines of the visitation contract. Nor will their familycounselor, who’ll be on hand to help them while you’re there. He’sconfident Tuher and Sema are fully on board where the stipulationsare concerned.”

Conyod swallowed. “They say so now, but Ihurt them. If they’re angry and hiding it—”

“Conyod.”

Again, there was no reprimand in Hupsan’sgentle tone. Merely caring.

Conyod drew a deep breath. The once-a-weekvisits his parents were allowed at the facility where he’d beenremanded had gone well for the last four months. The first coupleof attempts had been a nightmare, true, what with Lafec dissolvingin hysterical tears when the time had come for the clan to leave.Vel had ended up raging, forcing Tuher and Sema to shove himthrough the exit. He’d left shouting the court and Dr. Hupsan werewrong to keep his son caged far from his parents.

Vel hadn’t noticed the irony of accusingHupsan of keeping Conyod a virtual prisoner. It was as if he hadn’trecognized it was exactly what he’d done before the teen hadmanaged to run off. It would have been funny if it hadn’t been sohorrible.

“Vel and your mother can’t override Dr. Onbaland Dramok Tuher, especially with Imdiko Sema backing them up.There are also emergency protocols local law enforcement willfollow to extricate you from your home should the orderly requestassistance or fail to check in at the appointed hour.” Hupsan gavehim a level look. “Conyod, what are you really afraid of?”

How could he explain it? The fear he’d gohome and find himself unable to leave was real, as was beingsmothered by his parents’ terror. However, his situation wasn’tmuch different at the institution. He wasn’t allowed to leave itsgrounds unsupervised. Orderlies and security kept tabs on him inthe facility.

It was different, though. He was simply a jobto the institution’s staff. They were friendly and kind, but Conyodwas one of many patients they were paid to be responsible for.

“My existence isn’t the main focus here.”Conyod was dimly aware he continued his line of thinking ratherthan answering Hupsan’s question. “No one’s life depends on whetherI’m present or if I disappear.”

“You’re important to us,” Hupsan said.

“I guess. But your world won’t end if I’mgone. My parents…I felt if I vanished like my brother, they’dsimply…I don’t know. Cease to be.” He swallowed. “I wanted to runaway ages before I did, but the fear I’d somehow cause them to diekept me from doing so until I couldn’t survive another moment. Isit stupid I felt not being there would kill them?”

“Not at all. You were made to feelresponsible for their emotional well-being after Hoslek’s death. Nochild should be asked by his parents to shoulder such anobligation, even at your current age.”

Conyod nodded. “I think you’re right, atleast in my head. But the idea of going home makes it hard tobreathe. I’m afraid I’ll be crushed under their worry.”

“I understand. I doubt you’ll be rid of thefear until you actually do return home and experience them actingdifferently than you expect. This short visit could go a long wayto easing your concerns, if your parents do as they’re supposedto.”

“If they don’t—”

“Then we reassess and begin building anew.”Hupsan’s smile was comforting. “I’m not saying there won’t besetbacks in the future, but you need to give them a chance to dobetter.”

“Okay.” Doubt loaded the word.

“I gave you a project to work on. Have youconsidered what will give you a definite signal home is becoming asafe place for you to live again?”

Conyod had. “Nothing that would be proof forthis visit.”

“No, I sincerely doubt you’d find it for awhile yet. Your assignment was for a sign you could look for in thefuture, maybe after a more extended visit of a couple of days.”

“Being allowed to leave the house on my own.Even just being outdoors near the house when it’s dark. Maybe ifthey’d let me stay out all night so I can watch for the ghost.”

“Ah, the phantom boy so many of your family’sranch hands reported in the months prior to you running off.”Hupsan watched him sharply. “Do you believe in paranormalphenomena, Conyod?”

He shrugged. “I’ve never seen anythingsupernatural, but I trust some of the guys who mentioned it.”

“Your parents were adamant the witnesses hadbeen drinking.”

“Not all of them. Mother was convinced theghost was real. I caught Vel watching for it before I ranaway.”

“You did?”

“I sometimes woke up at night feeling jumpy.”When Hupsan’s brows rose, Conyod rushed to add, “I’d had a baddream and couldn’t go back to sleep, so I decided a little walk tothe stables to visit the kestarsh might help.”

“I thought you weren’t allowed to leave thehouse when it was dark?”

---