Page 182 of Be My Wife

I drag myself inside and flop into the couch, smothering the scream that wants to tear out of my throat into the nearest pillow.

Why does nothing work out for me?

A streetlamp sheds a silver glow through the window.

At least it can’t get any worse than this.

Today was… a lot.

First, I got fired from my job at the Roly Poly Moley.

Which… to be honest…

It’s not a huge loss.

Skating around in a tacky pink uniform for crappy pay and fielding rowdy male customers who request I ‘shake my boobs’ for a higher tip was never something I saw myself doing at twenty-four.

Leaving that job behind was long overdue.

Know what else is over-due?

My tuition.

Rent.

My student loans.

It was a crappy job.

Minimum wage.

But it was mine.

I was good at it.

And then it was gone.

After getting fired, I called my boyfriend. We met up at his place. I fell into his arms. His big muscular chest surrounded me, protected me from the panic. I forgot about losing my job. I forgot about my bills. Everything.

It was almost perfect.

Almost.

Until Kenny sat up and told me he had something to talk about.

I squeeze my eyes shut. Try to sink deeper into the couch. Try to find some position that eases the ache in my chest.

Misery digs into the underbelly of my heart and lurks in the shadows of my soul. I didn’t realize I had such strong feelings for Kenny until he broke up with me.

That was the worst part—realizing how vulnerable I was.

I let myself be weak.

I should have known better.

Over and over again, I’ve been hurt by people who leave me when things get hard, but instead of growing thicker skin, I let Kenny pierce through the walls and get to my soft, sensitive places.

I begged him not to abandon me.

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