Page 55 of When Cardinals Appear

We went to the side of his house where the bedrooms were, and he opened a door. The room had a desk and a computer on one side. On the other was a bed, two bowls, and a cardboard box with litter in it. Curled up on the chair by the computer was the cutest little gray kitten I’d ever seen.

“Aww, who is this little guy?” I asked, slipping over and kneeling to let the kitten sniff me. He nuzzled his face into my hand, and I scratched his ears.

“That’s Shadow. I found him last night after the dance.”

I looked up at Nate. “No mama cat around?”

He shook his head. “Not that I could find. This one was half starved and freezing. I took him to the emergency vet last night, and they said he was fine, just cold and hungry. I picked up a few odds and ends to make him comfortable, but I planned to get more stuff today.” He crouched beside me, running a hand over Shadow’s fur.

I smiled. “I’m glad to see you never lost your love of animals. Though I wish you’d found a way to turn it into a career.”

“I’ve been thinking about that lately,” he said, keeping his gaze on the cat. “While it’s probably too late to start a career as a veterinarian, and I wouldn’t feel right selling the shop, I’ve thought about volunteering at the animal shelter.”

“That’s a great idea! And who knows? Maybe you could find a position part-time at the vet. They were always seeking assistants when I was growing up.”

He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know. It might not be conducive to keeping my hours at the shop.”

I shrugged. “So cut back. You’re the boss, after all. And I’m sure Jeff would love to be in charge more often, gain that experience.”

“Maybe. Anyway,” he said, clearly trying to change the subject, “I’ve been bottle-feeding Shadow every few hours since I found him. That’s why I haven’t texted you.” His eyes met mine. “Well, that, and I wasn’t sure what to say.”

I nodded, focusing on stroking Shadow’s fur while I worked up the nerve to give my speech. Nate stood and held out a hand to help me up. Each time we touched, that familiar flash of heat traveled up my arm.

He led me to the living room. A black couch lined the back wall, directly across from a television stand. Perched on the stand was a small flat-screen TV, almost as dusty as the one we’d just removed from my mom’s house. I supposed he didn’t have much time to watch it with his hours at the shop.

“Do you want something to drink?”

“Water would be nice,” I said, my throat suddenly very dry.

While he went to the kitchen, I mentally rehearsed once more what I would say as I surveyed the rest of the room. I noted how bare the walls were and how dark the house seemed, even with rays of light peeking in the window on the side. Had he recently moved in? Nate had always been a minimalist, but that was extreme, even for him.

When he returned with the glasses, I took a long drink, buying myself some time. “Have you lived here long?”

“A few months,” he said, scanning the room as if seeing it for the first time. “I know it’s a bit spartan, but I don’t need much.”

“So I remember.”

He frowned. “You said you wanted to talk.”

“I do.” A flush crept up my neck as I remembered saying those exact words to James the other night. I cleared my throat and steeled myself. “I’m sorry for not telling you about James sooner. The truth is, I wasn’t sure there was any point in it. When I first came home, I planned to finalize the estate as soon as possible and then hightail it to California.”

“And now?”

I met his gaze. His eyes were wary, but underneath, I thought I detected a hint of hope. I didn’t allow myself to dwell on that, as there were a few things I wanted to explain before I got to where things currently stood.

“James and I had agreed that we would go apartment shopping together. But then, the day you and the guys came over to help us move furniture, he called to tell me he’d found the perfect place for us to live.” I twisted my hands. “I don’t know exactly why that hit me so hard, but it did.” Then I launched into the same things I had told James about feeling like I had so little control over my life and how being part of the process of finding a place to live meant a lot to me.

“I understand,” Nate said. “Did you tell him that?”

I shook my head. “Not at the time, but we talked about it after we left the dance.” My throat closed, and I swallowed the lump that formed. “He asked me if I still had feelings for you.”

Nate went still beside me, as if he was holding his breath, waiting for the answer. I forced myself to look at him, wanting him to see in my face, in my eyes, the truth of what I was about to say.

“I told him I still care for you.”

While a light came into his eyes, he didn’t comment on my revelation. “What did he say?”

“Well, he wasn’t thrilled.” I closed my eyes. “He planned to propose to me that night.” Nate sucked in a breath, but I went on before he could speak. “Obviously, that didn’t happen. But he did say something that’s been weighing on my mind.”

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