Page 18 of I Want You

“Are you still sick?”

“No,” she said, curtly. “About last night—”

I held up my hand to stop her. I’d heard enough about last night already. “I don’t care. It’s not your fault what happened.”

“But if that woman didn’t help you…”

“Rose, god, it’s not your fault and I’m sick of talking about it already.”

“Fine, I just wanted to say I was sorry that I stayed back.”

“Okay.”

We stood out on the balcony in silence as she lit her cigarette and took a long drag, something was going on with her. I could see it. My mood was well and truly fucked now.

After Matilda’s tirade and refusal to allow me to thank her, or even apologize, to this. There was only so much I could take.

I turned on my heel and headed back inside, past everyone and out into the middle of the hotel foyer. My chest was constricting, making it hard to breathe. Since when did I let people take everything from me? Since when had I become a fucking doormat?

No.

The old Gen needed to come back out. The one who didn’t give a fuck about what people thought of her. The one who took what she wanted, no matter who she hurt because this pain in my chest fucking hurt.

I could hear Rose calling out to me, and Mara, but I kept walking, out of the hotel and toward the beach. The crashing waves usually made me feel at peace but right now, I felt like I was a missile about to hit its target and everyone was about to feel the blowback.

My mind raced. This started when I decided to meet up with a guy from a social media app. Scott fucking Walker.

He’d been the last man I had slept with. The last man I had wanted for my own. My therapist believed I should be sleeping around again, getting him out of my system, but it wasn’t him that plagued my thoughts.

It was the look on Matilda’s face when she saw what had been happening in her very bed. In her apartment. Somehow, I believed she had to have known. She had to, right? No woman could be that clueless.

Ah fuck, what would I know? My longest relationship had been with a woman when I was fresh out of high school and thought men were the anti-christ. Maybe I’d been right back then. Maybe they were the anti-christ and women were the way to go.

I headed back to my bungalow and changed into my swimming costume before I entered the lagoon from my balcony. The water was warm, making it easy to swim around. I swam up to the bar and ordered a cocktail. The barmaid nodded and set about making the drink. I sat on the side of the bar, sipping at my mojito and wondering if I should head back for the afternoon sessions. Maybe I could get toasted and sleep it off until tomorrow.

Maybe I could find a way off this island tonight and back to my life, away from the drama.

Away from her.

CHAPTER6

GEN

I’d decidedagainst the night of commiseration and decided I would join the dinner, and start living for me on this damn island. I would attend the lectures, the talks, the workshops, whether or not Matilda wanted me there. This weekend wasn’t hers, it was all of ours, and she could get fucked if she thought I was going to feel sorry for her anymore.

I turned around to check the back of the dress in the mirror before smiling. My ass was prominent, not exactly Kim K kind of prominent but there was definite curvature.

My dress was tight as sin though so this could be a very quick dinner. I grabbed my clutch and I headed out of the bungalow, and toward the hotel. The restaurant was on the fourth floor, on the rooftop, so it was going to have some killer views.

As I got to the hotel, I could see a line of women waiting for the elevator. There was no option of taking the stairs tonight, my heels were far too high for that kind of risk and this dress probably wouldn't allow me to lift my legs to take them.

A long wait it would be.

I looked over toward the bar and saw there were a few women in there, waiting for the line to diminish, so I decided to join them. When I saw it was the E’s, I knew instantly I was in for a bad time. I sat down at the bar and ordered a mojito. The laughter and loud voices became hushed voices as they noticed me sitting there, within earshot. I rolled my eyes and turned around to watch them all pretend like they hadn’t been talking about me or looking at me.

The barmaid smiled at me, as if she knew, and slid me an extra shot across the bar. I gratefully accepted and started to sip at my drink, looking at my phone and keeping an eye on the elevator line. It was moving quick enough so I’d probably only have time for one drink. I put my phone away and finished my drink, joining the line.

My phone rang as I was about to step on the elevator with the E’s. I decided against joining and took the call.