Page 58 of Broken

"Well, thank you for letting me be the first, I guess." He laughed.

I didn't know how long we lay there, my head on his chest, his arms around me. At some point, I fell asleep, and when I woke, Kai was gone.

He made sure to put a throw pillow under my head and cover me with a blanket. A part of me was a little sad to wake up alone.

It was still dark, so I doubt I slept long. I checked my phone and saw a text from Kai telling me that he figured I'd be more comfortable if Aine didn't find us cuddled up on the couch together first thing in the morning. He was right.

thirty-one

Sinclair

Iwokeupwiththe worst headache. It was all the junk food the night before. Or it could have been the fact that I cried myself back to sleep last night after I woke up alone on the couch.

I woke with the worst headache. It was all the junk food the night before that triggered the pain, or maybe because I cried myself back to sleep last night.

Kai should hate me. I represented everything that was wrong in his life. I made his life difficult growing up, always in trouble with my parents abuse. Hell, he even thought I fucked his brother once until I cleared that up. I was a walking, talking disaster. I was also his best friend back then.

Everything changed the night of our senior prom. I had fallen in love with Kai. He told me he loved me. I just thought that's what all teenage boys said to a girl to get them into bed. I didn't care though. I wanted Kai to erase all the pain and memories of the bad experiences of my past. I needed his touch to replace Adams, my fathers. I needed his gentle hands to erase my mother's beatings.

It worked, for a while. For those two and a half months that we spent every night in each other's arms, all my demons were gone, and my nightmares stopped. Everything was perfect. I had a little bit of happiness, I mattered to someone. But I ruined everything by putting Kai's future in jeopardy when I got pregnant.

I guess things could've worked out, but I thought he would hate me so, I left and pushed him away. I was pregnant with his child, and I kept it from him. I didn't even tell him when I went home to tie up my piece of shit mother's loose ends after she died.

He found out by looking at her picture, a picture I want back. But he still says he loves me. He told me last night. I was confused and afraid. What if he woke up a week, a month, or even a year from now and hated me? What if he decided to take Aine from me?

I made myself a coffee and sat with Aine as she ate her breakfast. She bounced with excitement. She invited Riley over and wanted to introduce her to Kai. She was so proud of her dad; I hadn't realized she was missing something all these years, until now. Two days in, and she already adored him.

I wouldn't think about my other fear. The stronger, more painful fear than Kai taking Aine from me. What if he broke her heart? What would I do if he hurt my little girl?

Before I had the chance to think about that further, I got a call from an unknown number. Fuck. I really didn't want to answer the phone, but I still hit that little green circle.

"Hello." I greeted the caller hesitantly.

"Sinny. Hey, It's Noah."

Oh, thank fuck. I had never been so happy to hear Noah's voice.

"I called to let you know we have an offer on the house. I'm emailing it to you now. If you want to accept, we can start the paperwork and get the ball rolling today."

"Sounds great Noah. I'm sure I'll accept it. I honestly just want it all done and over with."

"Mom, he's here." Aine came bursting into my room.

"Okay, ladybug. I'll be there in a second." I whispered, trying to be discreet and avoid any awkward questions with Noah. "Who are you talking to mom?"

Noah must've heard her in the background because he chose that moment to finally ask about the elephant in the room.

"So, my brother finally meeting his daughter?" I sensed a hint of disappointment in his voice. It hurt; Noah was as much my close friend as Danielle.

"Noah." I sighed. "It's complicated."

"Sin, don't explain to me. Explain it to Kai. Whatever is between you two, that's on you guys." "Thank you."

I agreed to reply to his emails as soon as possible, and we hung up. Thankfully Aine had decided to go and let her father in on her own and didn't ask about my phone call a second time.

She was happy to see her father. I never doubted Kai would be a wonderful father someday, and a part of me regrets the time the two of them missed. I still wouldn't change a thing, though.

I sent a text to Danielle telling her I needed a wingman. She replied back almost immediately telling me she was on her way. Sometimes, I didn't know what I would do without her. A part of me wanted her to meet Mia and Tess. The three of them were going to hit it off. But there another part of me found comfort in keeping my old life separate from my new.

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