Page 21 of Dirty Love

“What’s wrong?” I ask after a while, tilting his chin up when he doesn’t answer right away. “Nicky, tell me.”

He rolls his eyes and drops his head back on my arm, hesitating before he decides to do as he’s told. “It’s stupid but I just… I really hate my life sometimes.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean you have your girlfriend and the boys and the entire school at your feet and what do I have?” he asks, laughing lightly like he thinks he’s pathetic. “Mom’s gone, Dad’s a fucking lunatic, all my friends are your friends, and I can’t even date anyone because I’m not allowed to like who I like. I have no one, Kade.”

Fuck, is he serious?

“Look at me right fucking now,” I demand, pulling his hair a little harder than I intended to, making him wince, but I don’t stop until his eyes hit mine. “I don’t give a fuck about any of those people and neither do you. You have me, baby brother. I’m your someone.”

“But one day—”

“One day nothing,” I stress, already knowing what he’s thinking without having to hear it.

He thinks I’ll marry some chick in ten years and live with her and have kids with her or some shit, and even though there’s a chance that might happen—although it’s a really fucking small one—I’d never even think about leaving him alone to live my life without him.

Nicky is my life and he always will be.

It’s that fucking simple.

He stares at me and I stare at him, unsure what to say or where we go from here.

I don’t tell him that he could find himself a boyfriend after we leave this town because I don’t like that idea.

The thought of anyone touching him, of anyone taking him from me like that… it makes me fucking vicious.

Before I can think of a way to kill a fucker who doesn’t even exist on my radar yet, Nicky grins like he’s a mind reader and I blink, only just realizing my fingers are tangled in his hair and my mouth is less than an inch from his, our hard dicks pressed together through the fabric of our underwear.

“I love you, too, brother,” he jokes, raising a brow when my cock jerks against his.

Fuck.

I should let him go—I really need to let him go—but I don’t do that. I’m too focused on the way he’s still fucking grinning, eyes on mine with his bottom lip trapped between his teeth. I glare at him but he pretends not to notice, lifting the blanket over our heads to cloud us in darkness. Twisting himself from my grip on his hair, he leans up on one elbow and runs his thumb over the corner of my lip. My mouth parts on its own and he kisses that same spot, shifting his body a little bit like he’s trying to get even closer to me. He can’t get any closer considering there’s not a breath of space left between us, but it seems he’s dead set on trying. He does it again and I snatch his waist to stop him, but then he sucks in a breath and his hips buck, causing his dick to rub right up against mine.

“Kade,” he rasps over my lips. “Do that again.”

“What? This?” I ask, digging my fingers into his waist.

His head falls back and he moans—fucking moans for me—grinding his needy little dick against mine as if he can’t help but chase the friction. I must be out of my mind, because instead of pushing him away, I find myself taking advantage and dipping my head to taste him, lightly kissing the edge of his mouth the same way he did to me. He shivers and I drag his thigh up to my waist, rolling him over until he’s flat on his back and I’m on top of him. I don’t know what the fuck’s gotten into us or who moves first, but we’re full on kissing now and I’m letting it happen. I’m kissing Nicky, ignoring the fact that my girlfriend’s waiting for me to make her come in the next room over, ignoring everything but the way his soft lips feel moving against mine.

Fucking perfect.

Needing to feel more of him, I rake my fingers through his hair and pull, stretching the collar at his neck to taste the pulsing vein there. He moans again and I lick him slowly, freezing when a distant knock fills my ears, followed by the sound of Arianna’s tired voice.

“Kade?” she calls, knocking again when she gets no answer. “Babe, you still in there?”

My shoulders lock and I pull back a bit to look at Nicky, fucking horrified when I realize what we were just doing, what I was just doing to my own brother. He clings to me but I shake my head no, grabbing his wrists to pin them to the sheet either side of him.

“That didn’t happen.”

“Kade.”

“That didn’t happen, Nicky,” I hiss, pushing myself up to toss the blanket away. “Jesus.”

His face crumples with rejection and I leave before I do something stupid, like retake that empty spot between his thighs and fuck his mouth with my tongue, dry fuck him and make him moan again until he comes all over himself.

Fucking stop.

---