Page 45 of The Ties That Bind
“Yes, thank you, Sir Davis,” Lea murmured uncomfortably.
As they were walking outside to lay out on the beach, Lea asked, her voice was little better than a strangled cry, “Does he really hate my jokes?”
Brie wrapped an arm around her and laughed. “No, I’m sure he doesn’t.”
“That’s not very reassuring.”
Brie leaned over and whispered, “Sir winked at me when he was talking to you. I think he was just having fun.”
“Oh!” Lea’s entire face suddenly brightened. “Well, I like a good challenge. I’ll just hit him with my best baby joke before I leave. I’ll make him laugh, just you wait!”
“That’s the spirit,” Brie encouraged her, giving Lea a playful punch on the shoulder. There was no one in the world like Lea—she was a breath of pure joy.
Lea whipped off her t-shirt, exposing her large boobs, which were straining against her tiny polka dot bikini. “How do you like my new swimsuit?”
Brie stared at her chest. “All I see are boobs, girlfriend.”
“Perfect, right?” She twisted back and forth to show off every angle.
Slipping off her own shirt, Brie heard Lea whistle appreciatively. “Well now, would you look at that? Your boobs are humungous, Stinky Cheese!”
Brie looked down at her breasts. “I suppose they are. Just one of the perks of pregnancy.”
“Well, at least there’sonepositive thing about housing a little alien.”
“Besides the miracle of life?” Brie teased.
Lea crinkled her nose. “You know, Brie, I’d make a joke about newborns right now, but…” She glanced to the side playfully, pouting her lips. “The delivery would be too painful.”
Brie groaned. “That was awful, Lea.”
“So bad you loved it. Am I right?” Lea threw her fist in the air in a silent cheer before lying down on her beach towel. “You know I have another baby joke for you, right?”
Brie grinned as she lay down beside her. “I’d be offended if you didn’t.”
“Do you know how warm a baby is at birth?”
Brie snorted. “How would you know? You’ve never been pregnant.”
Lea batted the air with her hand like a cat. “Come on! You have to play along, Stinky Cheese.”
Brie rolled her eyes good-naturedly. “Fine. How warm?”
“Womb temperature,” Lea answered, bursting into a fit of giggles.
Brie looked up at the sky, shaking her head. “Where do you even find these?”
“I have a secret vault of funny goodness. If the apocalypse happened tomorrow, I could supply you with a steady stream of jokes for at least two years.”
Brie cringed. “That’s actually kind of scary to think about.”
“I know! I’ll be like the ultimate secret weapon, unleashing my jokes on the enemy to distract them while the infantry marches in from behind.”
“Sounds like you have the apocalypse all figured out.”
“Yep! I plan to save the world—one joke at a time.”
Brie reached out, squeezing Lea’s hand. “I love your warrior spirit.”
