Page 23 of Caged in Desire
As she continues to rave about all the people who helped her be camera-ready for the wedding while she eats her third cookie with her left hand, I reach for her right. Sunlight catches on my wedding band, and for the first time, I’ve become so used to its presence that I forgot it was there. Katarina pauses her story as I kiss her knuckles, silently entreating her to stop her diatribe, attributing her success on our wedding day to anyone but herself. When I leave our hands connected and place them back down on her thigh, she gives mine a squeeze.
My wife hasn’t had enough people in her corner to support her and ensure she knows what an incredible woman she is. She might not have wanted for anything materialistic in her childhood, but it’s clear there was a void where emotional support and love should have been. Someone should have been taking better care of her.
It just so happens that for the first time in my life, I find myself thrilled at the prospect of being responsible for taking care of someone. As a friend or…more, I can make her life easier and encourage her in all of her pursuits. God, she’s perfect. She deserves someone in her corner, and the ring on my finger reminds me it’s my duty to be there.
Instead of feeling like a foreign weight, my ring feels solid and warm, providing comfort and protection. Exactly what Katarina needs and what I’ll strive to give her, whether she realizes she needs me or not.
Chapter twelve
Henry stands from his seat when I finish my dinner and holds out his hand. For the past week, he’s been waiting for me so that we can leave together to do our nightly crosswords. In fact, since our walk last weekend, he’s been doing a lot of things differently.
Blushing, I think back to a few days ago…
A perfunctory knock and my bedroom door flies open, startling me out of my pain-sleep haze.
“Katarina? Are you alright? Why didn’t you come to the pool this morning?”
I look up from my nest in bed to find Henry, still in his swim trunks. Based on the time glowing from my bedside clock and the fact that he appears to be dry, it seems he waited around ten minutes before coming to find me. Wincing, I sit up as he catches my facial expression and takes a quick step forward to try to figure out what’s hurting me. I decide that trying to be discreet will be useless. After all, we are married…
“I’m okay. But I started my period last night, so I’m bloated and I have awful cramps. Usually, my first day is the worst,and then I’m back to mostly normal by tomorrow. So I don’t think I’ll swim today, or get up to much at all, honestly…” I look up to see if he’s grossed out or mad that I’m making a big deal out of it.
He sits on the edge of my bed-nest and takes my hand, kisses my knuckles lightly, and toys with my wedding band.
“What helps?” he asks, and his gray eyes look so intense in the darkness of my room that I’m confused by his question.
“Wha?”
A knowing smirk tells me he knows I’m distracted by his shirtlessness and warm presence in my bed, even only at the edge.
“What helps your cramps? Have you taken ibuprofen? Do you have a heating pad? Chocolate?”
My face must show confusion at which woman in his life he’s taken such care of to know period remedies because he laughs and immediately dispels my jealousy.
“You forget, I have spent a little time around my sister, as she experienced such things, particularly when home for the holidays. And I assure you, prior to menopause, my mother was never shy about making sure we boys knew exactly the pain that women go through. She thought it was very important that we all know how to ‘cherish and care for our future goddesses,’ as she would say,” he finishes quietly, still holding my hand and waiting for me to tell him what I need.
“Heat always helps the most, but I can’t find where I packed my heating pad. It might have ended up in a box destined for storage, I’m not sure. My ibuprofen in the bathroom has expired. And yes, I’m craving chocolate. Specifically, the variety bag of truffles and dark chocolate, and hot chocolate with peppermint sticks. And truffle fries, although that’ll be more of a lunchtime thing. I can get all this later after I sleepjust a bit longer, though—” I’m cut off by another kiss to my knuckles and a no-nonsense glare.
“Stay here, see if you can rest a bit more before the sun comes up. I’ll make sure you have everything you need today.”
And he did. I dozed a bit, waking up to find different sizes of heating pads, chocolates, my favorite gummy candies, and a mug of hot chocolate resting on a warmer on my bedside table.
Henry’s voice carries from the hallway, head poking in as he sees I’m awake again, and smiles at me. Holding up one finger, he goes to end his call.
“Nope, Linda, I won’t be in today. I don’t care what you tell people. Tell them I have the flu, very contagious, too tired to call in from home. I’ll probably be back tomorrow. We’ll see.” Ending the call, he tosses his phone onto the bed before helping me sit up and adjust my heating pad. He hands me my mug, placing a peppermint stick in as he does.
“You didn’t have to do all this or stay home with me. But I really, really appreciate it,” I say, inhaling the rich aroma of the hot chocolate.
Sitting next to me on the bed, he hands me the remote. “You’re welcome, although I disagree. I think I absolutely had to do all of this, as you are, in fact, my responsibility these days. Now, take this ibuprofen and show me what your unhinged reality TV favorites are up to.”
My smile at the memory turns into confusion as we arrive at the study, but there’s only one paper laid out on the coffee table. Henry picks it up and pulls out the crossword to hand to me.
“Here, you can do it tonight. I’ll finish reading where I left off this morning,” he says, taking his seat and flipping through the pages.
I sit and look down, moments passing as I stare at the empty puzzle. I look up to see Henry still lost between the pages of today’s news. My first thought is to share this with him and workon it together, but there isn’t a good seating arrangement to make that comfortable.
The idea to sit in his lap springs into my mind. Two weeks ago, I wouldn’t have considered acting on this, but things have been changing between us. Deciding to just go for it, I get up, round the table, and plop down sideways on his lap.
“Katar…what…”
