Page 40 of Falling for Paris
Hold me tight and don’t let go. Tell me I belong to no one else but you. Tell me you won’t let me leave.
He wanted to. God, he wanted to. But how could he ask her to leave her life? Her career, her family, her community. For him? That was ridiculous.
Rafael couldn’t reconcile the conflicting facts: He craved Tori but he had no right to. He wanted her in his life but he shouldn’t. He longed to give himself but his insecurities made him feel like he wasn’t enough. Not for a woman like her, brimming with life. The thought of dimming her brilliance or holding her back made his teeth hurt. Or that might be from his locked jaw, who knew anymore.
At the end of the day, his love for her kept him from accepting her love. How fucked up was that?
The sharp ring of his phone made him jump. Rafael lunged at it, his heart leaping with hope. Tori. She would call and make all of his messy, stupid, anxious thoughts make sense.
Disappointment made him crumple to the sofa. It was Inez. His friend was back in Paris and had been calling him daily to stay in touch. Certain decisions needed to be made for invoicing and expansion and staffing. Now that he wasn’t hiding in the cave of self-pity, their partnership was beginning to look more like the one that started their business. Not today though. He let it go to voicemail. Her text pinged.
Inez:I realize you’re in the middle of honeymoon heaven but you need to call me later today. Today! We need to change our delivery service since they’re raising their rates.
Honeymoon heaven? More like purgatory. As it turned out, judgment day had arrived. He belonged in hell for hurting the woman he loved. But he had to believe it was for her own good. Hehadto.
Rafael sighed with resignation. One thing he learned from the last few weeks was that sitting in his fortress of solitude solved nothing. If he couldn’t be the man Tori needed, he could at least be a useful businessman and decent friend.
Rafael:Email me the new invoices. I’ll look at it today and come in tomorrow. We can sort out the repair bills too while I’m there.
It wasn’t three beats before his phone rang again.
“Qu’est-ce qui ne va pas?” His friend asked what was wrong. They continued in French.
“Doing my job, obviously. I’ve leaned on you a lot this year. Time to carry my weight, that’s all.”
“You’ve always carried your weight, Rafael. This sounds more like evading my question,” she said with a snort.
“How do you figure?”
“You’re asking for emails and volunteering to come into the city when I know you’d rather be at home enjoying your girlfriend.”
“She’s not my girlfriend.”
“Ah.”
“What does that mean?”
“I didn’t say a thing!”
“You made that, that sound. Like you just solved something and I can’t even wrap my mind around the problem.”
“What can I say? I am all knowing. Took you long enough to figure it out.”
As much as he loved Inez, Rafael was in no mood for her light-hearted confidence.
“Email the documents. And, Inez, when I get there tomorrow, can you do me a favor?”
“I’ll do just about anything if you get the delivery and repair problems off my hands.”
“I, um, I still have Victoria Espinoza’s things since she, well, she left in a hurry. I’ll text her to arrange for you to bring her the luggage tomorrow. She leaves the next day.”
“Why don’t you bring it yourself if you can reach her?”
“I don’t want to get into it, Inez. Yes or no. If she lets me bring it to her, I will. If she doesn’t want to see me, will you do me this favor?”
“Of course,” she answered with a pitying gentleness that grated his nerves.
He hung up, determined to get something right today.
