Page 106 of Love Deep
My mom will want to come, I think to myself. And my dad. They’re not art lovers, but they’ll be proud. I think.
“Are you thinking soon?” I ask.
“We can do some planning, but we don’t have to set adeadline,” Rachel says. “But wewillneed to see some of your newer pieces sooner rather than later.”
I take a couple of breaths, trying to calm my body. Energy has started to fizz through me, and I realize that actually, I want a date in the calendar. I’m excited. I want people to see my work. Maybe it will be a complete disaster, but an exhibition at a New York gallery is what I used to dream about as a kid. This is what I’ve been waiting for my entire life.
“I want to work toward an exhibition,” I splutter out. “I have the entire summer where I can paint. Riley can come to the studio or can be with my parents.” I want this. I want this for me. I want this to show Riley that you can follow your dreams no matter your age. I want to be a painter.
“Good!” Grace says, beaming at me. “In the meantime, I’m going to reach out to my network and see if I can arrange some influential collectors to see some of your pieces. If we can get a sale from them, it will help us build buzz going into an exhibition. I think I might have someone for one of the pieces you just showed me in your studio—the blue piece.”
“Oh right,” I say, nodding. “So if that piece is sold before the exhibition, then you’ll need more?—”
“Not at all,” Rachel says. “Any buyer would be more than happy to lend it to us for the exhibition, and we can mark it as sold. And before you reach out to anyone, Grace, we’ll revisit Juniper’s pricing.”
Grace smiles. “Of course you will.” She nods toward Rachel. “Told you she was good.” My anxiety must show on my face, because her smile drops when she looks at me. “But there’s no pressure,” she says. “We’ll work with whatever timeline works for you. If it takes two years, it takes two years.”
“I’ll have all summer. But things get busy when Riley and I go back to school. Once the semester starts, if I just had some time in the week, it would be easier. If I worked part-time and Riley was at school, I’d have a lot more hours in the studio.” I do have that money from the Colorado Club that I’ve put aside for Riley’s college fund. But I really don’t want to spend it on living expenses. If I was certain I could replenish it, then maybe that would be an option. “When you say you think you have someone who might be interested in buying the blue piece, can we talk numbers? I’m just wondering if maybe if I sold some pieces before the show, I might be able to reduce my hours a little.”
“That sounds like an interesting idea,” Rachel says. “What kind of salary would you be looking to replace?” she asks.
“I make twenty-five thousand six hundred a year.”
Rachel and Grace exchange a look. And I feel like I’ve overstepped.
“Obviously, I would still work, so I’m not saying I’d need to replace that entire amount. And we could cut back. Although, I’m not sure where?—”
Rachel interrupts me. “Grace is going to sell that blue piece you’re working on, and what you get from that will cover your salary for an entire year, along with any amount you’re going to have to pay for materials.”
I swallow, trying to take in what she’s saying. “Twenty-five thousand, just for one painting?” I ask. “Are you serious?”
Grace and Rachel both nod, like what they’re telling me is no big deal.
“And you think I’d definitely sell one? I wouldn’t want to give up my job entirely in case I didn’t… It’s a lot to think about.”
“And no one is pressuring you to give up your job,” Rachel says.
“You should do what you’re comfortable with,” Grace says. “Going from being surrounded by children all day to being in your studio alone might be too big of a change to make all in one step.”
I can’t believe I’m even considering giving up my job. It’s been the only thing keeping Riley and me afloat all these years. Bill has always done the bare minimum. But they’re right, I don’t need to give it up completely. Maybe I just need to test these new wings over the summer and see if they work. See if being an artist feels like me. I have a feeling it will.
THIRTY-NINE
Juniper
I have a sense of optimism about the future that I haven’t felt in… I don’t know how long. I don’t know if it’s something in the New York air or because of my meeting with Grace and Rachel, but it feels like my insides have shifted around and I’m different somehow. Fundamentally changed by this trip.
“I wish we didn’t have to fly home tomorrow,” Riley says as we head west on 51stStreet.
“Yeah, me too,” I reply. “I’ve enjoyed out girls’ trip.”
“And it’s not just been any girls’ trip. We didn’t go to Colorado Springs, Mom. We’re in New York City.”
I laugh. “No, we go a little farther afield than Colorado Springs, don’t we.”
“We like to spread our wings!” Riley says, taking her hand from mine and holding out her arms. She drops her arms to her sides and slides her hand against mine again. It’s the start of what’s to come. She’ll need to hold my hand less while she goes out into the world. I’ll always be here whenshe needs me. My mom was right, Riley needed this as much as I did. She needed to see that you can be a long way from home and still feel connected to the people you love. We both needed to see that it wasn’t so scary to leave Star Falls. Even if it was just for two nights.
“Mom!” Riley yells, pointing ahead of us. “There it is. That’s Radio City Music Hall.” The familiar façade of the venue comes into view—the star-spangled banners hanging side by side next door, the illuminated red lights. “I can’t believe we’re here.”
