Page 21 of Pieces of Ash
“Like the rest of the world, he believes I am his sister-in-law.”
“Yes, of course.” Father Joseph nods. “And that is why you must tell him your true identity. Make it clear that you cannot marry him. It would, after all, be a mortal sin. Once he understands that you are actually his stepdaughter, he will withdraw his offer.”
I don’t care either way. I own you,cenusa. I bought you. Your body is mine! Your virginity is mine! Your pussy is mine! Your womb is mine, and I will pump it full of?—
A crazy, high-pitched sound escapes my lips. It’s an ugly laugh, and it echoes through the sacred space, eerie and all wrong.
“Miss Ellis?”
“Y-you don’t know him,” I say, my voice wavering. I take a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves, to no avail. “Father, believe me when I tell you, he willforceme to be his wife. No matter what.”
“He would place your very soul in peril?”
In a heartbeat, I think.He doesn’t care about me or my heart or my soul. He feels that he owns me. He made that very clear.Feeling hopeless, I let my head fall forward and cover my face with my hands, fear and shame washing over me like cold rain.
A long silence lies heavy between us before Father Joseph speaks again. “Miss Ellis, perhaps your grandparents could speak to him? They could explain that your mother was very young when you were born, and they stepped in as parent figures for you?”
My grandparents are already back in Wales, but I recall their faces across the conference table at my mother’s funeral, and I am more certain than ever that they knew of Mosier’s plans for me but were persuaded to look the other way in exchange for a comfortable life. Or maybe they just hated me so much for existing that they didn’t care what happened to me. Or maybe they were glad that I’d be forced into marrying Mosier, thus damning my soul to hell. That’s possible too.
“They have left the country,” I say softly, “and won’t be returning.”
“Why not?” he asks, his eyes narrowing.
“My stepfather will only provide for them financially if they remain in Wales. I wasn’t sure at the time, but now I believe he deliberately got rid of them so that they couldn’t interfere with his plans to marry me.”
Father Joseph sighs deeply. “Your father? Is he in the picture at all?”
“I never knew him,” I say. “My mother never told me who he was.”
“I am sorry,” says Father Joseph, his eyes sad, but ever kind. “Without family to intervene on your behalf, Miss Ellis, I will take it upon myself to contact your stepfather and explain?—”
“No! Please no!” My eyes must be wild as I lurch forward in the pew. “He would come and get me. He would take me. I would be trapped with him. Please don’t say anything to anyone, Father. Please don’t call him!” I sob as I recall the terrifying crudeness of his plans, the dark ruthlessness in his eyes. “He was very clear about his…desires. He wants me to have many children for him and?—”
He holds up a single palm to stop me. “I don’t require any further detail.”
“Don’t call him,” I say, my voice breaking in a sob.
“Calm yourself, my child.” He pats my hand gently two times. “You must see that he deserves to know the truth.”
“Please,” I beg him. “The moment he hears from you, he’ll come up here and take me. He’s powerful, Father. Determined. He’ll come and get me, and then I’ll be under his control. Indefinitely. Forever.”
“You’re distraught,” observes Father Joseph, looking at me closely. “I think you might benefit from a few days away, Miss Ellis. Your mother was only buried on Monday. You need a bit of time somewhere quiet to make peace with her loss.”
I consider this for a moment. Being sent away from Father Joseph and my school sounds scary on one hand, but on the other, the further I can get from Mosier, the better.
“While you are away, I will call your stepfather and explain everything to him.” He shifts in his seat. “Your grandparents are abroad, but do you have somewhere else to go? Just for a few days while this situation is sorted out?”
“No. There’s no one. I’m all alo—”La Belle Époque Galerie ~ 5900 Shelburne Road ~ Shelburne,VT ~ 05482.Of course. Gus. “Yes. Thereissomeone. My mother’s best friend. My godfather.”
“Your godfather.” Father Joseph’s face relaxes. “Would he take you in for a few days? If you could spend a few days with him, it would give me an opportunity to speak to your stepfather on your behalf and iron this out.”
An instant plan materializes in my mind. If I could get to Gus, maybe, just maybe, I would be safe from Mosier. I could hide there with Gus for a while. Forever.
Gus. His name is a benediction in the fury of my mind. I remember the happy months I spent with him while Tig was in rehab, the welcome sight of his face at the funeral on Monday, and a warm feeling washes over me, my heart thundering with sudden hope.
“Would you like to use the phone in the rectory to make arrangements?”
“I don’t need to,” I say, wiping away the leftover tears on my cheeks. “I know I’m welcome.”At any hour, anytime.
