His gaze slid down to his hands and he whispered, “Yes, like I said before…that’s why I’m here. For the money.”
Luke paused for a moment, then asked, his voice equally soft, “Where’s your dad, Roan?”
Ah jeez. Roan wanted to walk away. To tell Luke and John to shove this whole interview up their asses. But if he stayed a few more weeks, it would be more than enough for the trial; it would cover the stack of bills, too, and maybe leave enough to take his mom on a vacation somewhere nice and warm when she got better. Maybe bring her down here to Louisiana and let her have all that food she’d loved so much again. And the cocktails. Yes, definitely cocktails, too. To celebrate her return to health. And he could introduce her to Walker… He wanted to stick around for all of those reasons now, but Jesus. This wasn’t easy.
“Your dad?” Luke prompted again.
“He left.”
Luke held up a hand to stop him. “My dad left…”
They’d all been trained, before filming started, to use complete statements instead of obvious responses so the show could use those clips with or without airing the question.
“Sorry. My dad left when I was two years old. I never knew him, and my mom doesn’t talk about him.”
“And you’re an only child?”
“Yes. I’m an only child.”
Luke smiled. He seemed so friendly. “Just like Walker. He’s an only child, too.”
Roan realized he hadn’t known that. He’d assumed, but the topic of siblings—or the lack thereof—had never come up.
“This is important to you, isn’t it? Winning the show. So you can take the money home and help your mom get better.”
Roan hesitated, getting annoyed. Hadn’t they just gone over that? He sighed. It made him seem like an asshole, but it was the truth. He cringed at the thought of Walker ever seeing this, of him thinking Roan had faked everything just to get the cash, but by then everything would be done, and Walker would either understand or he wouldn’t. “Yes. I just want my mom to get better.”
“How do you feel about Walker?”
Color rose to his face, and he couldn’t do a thing about it. “Under different circumstances, I think he and I could have really hit it off. I’d love—I’d love to know him better. He’s fun, he’s sweet and kind. He cares about his ranch and his family and all the animals. And, obviously, he’s hot.” He laughed self-consciously. “In a lot of ways, I don’t want to be here,” he admitted. “I don’t want to be away from my mom this long. But…” He trailed off, feeling the strain of so much unspoken.
“But?”
“But I really want to know Walker better.”
“And Walker? What do you think you could bring to him as a partner if your heart’s with your mom?”
“I don’t know. But who’s to say what makes a good relationship?” He might as well throw it all on the table. “I do like Walker a lot. And I think he likes me pretty well, too. This is a weird way to have met, and God knows we both have a lot going on in our lives. But so what? So what if I’m a grad school dropout picking up shifts at the local coffeeshop to put food on the table, and he’s a successful farmer? So what if he’s older than me? Or whatever? If we can get through being on this show, and we can get through my mom being sick, then we could probably make it through anything. And isn’t that what a good relationship is about?”
God, he sounded ridiculous and desperate.
“Thanks, Roan. That was great.” Luke patted Roan’s hand. “And I know that wasn’t easy. For what it’s worth, I truly am sorry for what you’re going through, and it’s not fair that these are the steps you’ve got to take to get your mom the care she deserves.”
Roan didn’t look him in the eye. He smoothed his hand over the counter until he bumped into his water bottle and opened it. “Can I go now?”
“I think Walker might want to talk to you before you do.”
Roan winced and nodded. “Okay. I guess I’ll wait here.”
Why was it that just the mention of Walker’s name made his heart thump?