Page 33 of The Paris Chapter

‘I wish I had noticed you too,’ I said honestly. ‘But we are here now, aren’t we?’

Ethan started to say something, but voices in the doorway broke us apart.

Juliette appeared, Oscar and Seb behind her, a bottle of tequila in her hand. ‘Shots, everyone?’ She saw us step back from one another. ‘Shit, are we interrupting?’

‘No,’ Ethan said, too quickly. I glanced at him. ‘Shots sound perfect to me.’ He avoided my eyes. Seb handed around shot glasses and Oscar poured out the tequila. I gripped my glass, my heart still beating faster than normal.

Ethan noticed me. He thought I was beautiful before Paris.

My mind was whirring.

‘Perfect, let’s raise a toast, yes? To my baby brother, I cannot believe you are twenty-six. To all your dreams coming true!’ Juliette said, raising her shot glass in the air.

We joined in the toast then all poured the tequila down our throats. I shuddered at the burn. Oscar immediately poured another and this time, he toasted Seb, then it was Ethan’s turn.

‘You are like the brother I never had,’ Ethan said. His toast was so simple, but Seb looked really emotional at his words and clapped him on the back.

Then a final round was poured out and they all looked at me expectantly.

‘Oh.’ I shifted on my feet, nervous. I was feeling very light-headed from the shots. ‘Happy birthday, Seb. I hope you have a wonderful year. How do I say “Cheers” in French?’

‘Santé!’ they all chorused, and we drank our final shot.

Oscar pulled out his phone. ‘A picture for Instagram.’ Theyall crouched down around me. Juliette slung an arm over my shoulders and Oscar snapped a few pictures of us. ‘I’ll tag you all!’ he said, typing into his phone.

I pulled my phoned out and looked at the photos Oscar had shared. Ethan was next to me in the picture, barely touching me, but I had felt that touch everywhere.

15

I walked around Juliette’s apartment, trying to find Ethan. After we’d had shots, we’d all gone back up to the party and he’d faded into the crowd. I wanted to talk to him. To carry on that conversation. To have him look at me again the way he’d been looking at me. I couldn’t get his words out of my head. I wanted to hear more. I couldn’t help it. It was like I was hooked on Ethan talking to me.

As I walked through a group of people, I finally spotted him.

And my heart sunk.

Ethan stood in a corner talking to a woman I hadn’t seen before. She was smaller than him, leaning against the wall as he stood close to her, talking into her ear. She was smiling up at him, a definite flirtatious look in her eyes. I stopped walking and watched. Ethan ran a hand through his hair and smiled back. That cute smile that he used when he talked to me. I was annoyed he was using it to talk to her. I wanted him to be talking to me. But I knew I hadn’t earned that right at all.

‘Go over there.’

I jumped when Juliette was suddenly beside me. ‘I don’t want to interrupt.’

‘Yes, yes, you do,’ she said.

‘That would be selfish. I’m not ready for…’ I looked at her. ‘Joe hurt me so much; I wouldn’t want to ever hurt someone else like that. What if I hurt Ethan?’

‘I will kill you.’ She saw my face and she took my hand and squeezed it. ‘Ethan gets a say, Tessa. You haven’t told him you like him, so tell him and see what he says.’

‘It’s come out of nowhere.’

‘Has it?’ She tipped her head.

I bit my lip. I remembered Ethan that first day in the apartment walking out of the bathroom in just his towel. I could have turned around and gone straight back home. But I hadn’t. I told myself it was because of my career, that I needed to try to get inspiration from Paris, but maybe part of me had been intrigued to be in the space with Ethan. To share the apartment with him.

Maybe I wanted to get to know him.

‘When I came back,’ Juliette continued, ‘Ethan asked if he could stay with me. I said of course but did he really want to, and he said if you wanted him to go, he would, but he hasn’t turned up at my door with his suitcase, has he?’

I swallowed. ‘No. I didn’t ask him to go. I don’t want him to go.’

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