Page 121 of Your Pucking Mom

“I’m kidding,” Ledger said as I struggled to get comfortable in the long dress, finally curling into the corner of the large sofa next to him.

“You weren’t kidding,” I teased, waggling my eyebrows at him, and he laughed again.

“Alright, you caught me,” he admitted, then paused. “Are we okay?”

I let out a small laugh. “I think that’s the understatement of the century. I don’t know what we are or what we’re going to do.”

“I want to be yours, Sunshine. We don’t need labels or anything if that helps you keep the door open, but I want to be yours.” His low, gravelly voice was full of longing, and I desperately wanted to reach out and hold his face close to mine.

“It’s messy. I’m messy,” I admitted.

He nodded, but I didn’t turn around; I needed to keep moving forward.

“I talked to my mother a few days ago,” I said.

“How’d that go?” he asked.

I narrowed my eyes at him, giving him an all-knowing look. “Terribly, per usual.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

I let out a deep sigh, unsure of where to start.

“Truthfully, there’s nothing new. I can’t change my mother for who she is. She’s a narcissist through and through. She’ll never admit she’s wrong or say sorry, but at the least, I told her that she couldn’t talk to me like she had anymore. I’m no longer a child and don’t need her help.” I paused, searching for Ledger’s eyes to send me a clue as to what he was thinking, but he just sat there listening.

“I used to think that I needed her in my life. I owed her for taking care of me and Austin when I was younger, but now I realize that I don’t owe her shit. She can’t treat me or speak to me the way she did in my apartment ever again. I won’t allow that behavior in my space.”

“Because you’re strong, Auburn,” Ledger added softly.

I thought about what he said for a moment. “I spent my entire life being told how weak I was or so many other negative views of myself it’s hard to imagine myself in any other way?—”

“But—” Ledger started to say, but I reached out, grabbing his hand to quiet him.

I looked behind him to where the floor-to-ceiling windows were. It was dark outside, but the faint glimmer of the city lights below us sparkled throughout the room. Between the lights and the candles, it was the most romantic place I’d ever been. This was by far better than any fancy formal date I’d ever wanted.

“Until you, Ledger. That’s how I felt until…you.”

“There were so many reasons we shouldn’t be together, Sunshine, but there’s something about you that makes me realize how much you belong in my life. You’re like honey to tea or the waves to the ocean. You make sense being in my life.”

I got up from where I sat and pulled my dress up to sit in Ledger’s lap. He opened his legs, and I sat between them, curling my feet around him and looking up in his whiskey-colored eyes.

“It’s going to be hard, Ledger. The coach. Your career. The other guys.” I listed all the reasons we were wrong for each other.

“I don’t care about any of them, and I never said it was going to be easy, but we will get through them together. We walk through the door…together.”

Tears in my eyes, he dropped down to give me a soft kiss atop my forehead. “I’m in love with you, Auburn Hart. Nothing else matters.”

“Except Austin,” I added quickly.

He let out a small laugh. “Yeah, and we’re a work in progress.”

“Work in progress is good,” I answered.

“This is the start, Auburn. This isn’t the end.”

I loved this man. I loved him with every broken piece of my soul. It was as if someone shattered the mirror in front of me and the pieces were laying below me. I could see them, but I didn’t know how they fit together. Ledger showed me the ways they connected. He showed me the sharp edges weren’t so scary.

“Ledger?” I asked, adjusting myself so my legs were wrapped around his waist. I had to pull my dress up and my entire lower half was exposed.

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