Page 34 of Born in the Spring

His normal, Jasper smile that’s for everybody else, and just as arresting, is the one on his face right now.

This is how I want to see him. Only because I never want to see him hurt. And I know what that looks like enough already.

There’s still a sadness tinging the corners, most noticeable once he tilts his head down during a break in the conversation, but more subtle today. And I hope by being here now, I can smooth those melancholic lines from his features so theywon’tbe permanent.

There are things I can’t change, but there are things I can.

“Elara! Daddy! She’s here!”

Jasper’s gaze snaps to mine at my shouted name before I meet Skylar’s, his cute chubby cheeks chubbier and cuter from his grin as he runs up to me. I grunt as he collides into me, and as I did when I nannied for his father, who’s rushing up right behind him, I pick him up for a quick greeting hug.

“Hey, Little Man,” I murmur in his ear with a squeeze, then place him back on his feet.

“What are you gonna call me when I’m big?” he asks, and I boop him on the nose.

“Big Man.”

He giggles and looks back at his dad. “She’s here,” he exclaims again, and Tripp nods with an excitement to match his son’s, though it’s exaggerated for added effect.

“She is,” he says back, then gives me a smile and a low, “Hey.”

“Hey,” I tell him back, low too, letting Skylar hold my hand when he grabs for it.

Tripp is in his forties and the years have been good to him. He has salt in his pepper hair, his beard included. He looks a little worn down, but I think that has everything to do with his divorce. Last year, he and his wife separated, and going off Vanessa’s words from last night, I’m guessing the divorce was finalized.

“I’m sorry to hear about. . .” I trail on the guess, keeping my voice low still and not saying the rest for Skylar’s sake, who’s busy swinging our hands around.

“News travels fast,” Tripp confirms, then says after a breath, “Thank you. And I was sorry to hear about Shepherd.” Skylar chooses this moment to drop my hand and I almost want his little fingers back. “Iamsorry,” Tripp retraces, and I open my mouth to assure him I know what he meant, when Skylar opens his mouth too.

“We’re about to go sledding! Wanna come?”

“Skylar, she just got back. . .” Tripp gives the light scolding with his calm tone to calm his son, but this time, it doesn’t work.

“Are you gonna be my nanny again?” Skylar bounces with this question, and all I’ve managed to do is look back and forth between him and his dad with my mouth moving around no words.

“I’m not sure yet,” I finally tell his wide, pleading stare. “I hope to be,” I add honestly, a sudden sting in my own that I blink away.

Tripp waits for my eyes to meet his, then he gives me a smile. “I’ll make sure Amie knows I need you.”

Jasper

I stop stalling in my approach once those suggestive words leave his mouth, myback offstare and tone reawakened as a weight on my chest. “You’ve been placed with Meredith,” I remind him, stepping up beside Elara as she makes a space for me. “And placements are usually final.” Which is true. Unless there’s a problem that warrants a swap…but Meredith is also great at her job, so I don’t see a problem.

“Usually,” he singles out, trying to push me back too with a similar stare, and I recognize that pity that still sticks to everyone’s faces. Thatout of your leaguelook. And it could be his stepping out of his bounds that keeps me showing my ass, but I give it back to him.

So are you, old man,mine says. He looks like he could be her grandfather.

Tripp Lancaster comes around the most for the ski season, and I never liked the guy. He never left Elara alone, always asking about her and always looking at her and always requesting her, and he wasn’t doing it for his son; he was doing it for himself. It always seemed like he was trying to fill my brother’s shoes, so I’m not surprised his marriage fell apart.

I’m no better, but I’m different.It’s different.

Someone I love was taken by someone else I love. It rubbed me wrong for both of us.

“It’s final,” I repeat, removing the clause entirely, and I feel Elara’s gaze on the side of my face as she starts to back me—our regulations—up against Tripp, who’s steady in our stare-down.

“Well, if you’ve been—”

“But I want Elara to be my nanny.”