Page 95 of Season of Gifts

Jay, swinging back to the table for her dishes, barked a cynic’s laugh.“That’s more than fair.”

Mother’s quiet hum carried a sad note.“And Emma and I do have more than a few commonalities, once we gently pick our way toward speaking of them.Shared pain is a burden halved.”

Henry hissed on his inhale and sighed on his exhale.His burden didn’t seem halved just yet.It hung across his shoulders and in the shadows beneath his eyes.

Alice smiled softly at him, trying to will her determination and newfound certainty to shore him up for a little longer.“Henry gets that wisdom from you, Mother.”

And passed it along to her.They’d both just forgotten from the moment Henry had gotten the call.She knew what her problem was—a thirteen-year-old in the driver’s seat.But she couldn’t guess at Henry’s; she would have to get him relaxed enough to tell her.Out of survival mode.

She couldn’t suggest he go with her to find a tree; that was Jay’s expertise.And she couldn’t suggest staying behind herself and sending Jay out on his own; he’d been alone far too much this week already.She could only create an opportunity to talk once that task had been accomplished.

Pushing up from the table, she dusted off her hands.“All right!Who’s ready to go find a tree with me so we can get this party started?”

Chapter forty-nine

Henry

Thelineofboxesstretched three high and four deep as Henry emptied the seasonal storage and created an ad hoc decorating station at the far end of the music room, leaving a clear path for the tree.He would owe Jay an apology; once the tree arrived and was locked in its stand, they would begin bedecking it immediately rather than waiting twenty-four hours for it to adjust.

“Nearly finished,” he answered Mother’s inquiry.“How are you faring?”

He drew closer, surreptitiously checking the level of water in Mother’s glass.She thankfully wasn’t at a stage that required limiting her liquids, but the care team had emphasized the importance of balancing hydration with not overworking her circulatory system.“Is there anything you need?”

“You’ve done plenty, darling.Come sit with me.”Mother rested on the settee with a blanket across her lap.The wide windows spilled sunlight across the floor.“Alice has sent a lovely picture of Jay chatting with a young woman over a counter, and she says, ‘Tell Henry we’ve made a business contact for Becky.’Do I know Becky?I’m afraid I don’t recall that name.”

Despite the discomfort at breakfast, the day was shaping up nicely.He’d successfully channeled his submissives into a pleasant diversion that was simultaneously a useful task, which allowed him to focus on Mother’s health.“Nor should you, unless Natalie has been telling you tales.Becky is Jay and Natalie’s niece.Thanks to his intervention, she is preparing to run the family business for the next generation.”

Truly, his mental faculties had slipped.Had he been thinking rationally, he would have encouraged regular chats for Mother and Jay over the last two weeks.The companionship would have benefitted them both, though he would have monitored to ensure Mother didn’t overtax herself.

“Intervention?Is that a topic I ought to avoid or lean into?”Shaking her head, Mother sighed softly.“Your husband has so many pain points, darling.It’s good for him to talk about them.His sister as well—she’s rather preoccupied with another drama just now, though I believe the favor Alice asked of her will be a help there.”

“The favor Alice asked?”A tussle began in his chest, the opening feints of a classical wrestling match.He very much wanted Alice to step into her dominance and deepen her bond with Jay.

When and where he could witness and praise.

Mother was concealing her phone use from him; Alice was concealing an unknown request of Jay’s sister—and after she’d arranged for Jay’s luncheon with his brother as well.The emerging pattern pushed him toward irrelevance.For a moment she’d seemed on the precipice of a coup at breakfast.Today would be a day to restore order and harmony.

“Have you not…” Pressing her lips together, Mother tilted her head.She’d drawn her hair back this morning; he ought to wash it for her again today.Keeping her arms raised to do so herself in the shower would exhaust her.“Well, it’s not my place to say, then.Natalie’s business is her own, and I’m certain Alice will speak to you when you give her the opportunity.”The tender green shoots of spring unfurled in Mother’s eyes, her gaze velvety soft.“You slept at my bedside again last night.I am not so frail and helpless, Henry.I’m putting my foot down tonight.You need time with your spouses.”

“What I need is to be kept informed of all of the variables so that I might properly account for them in my planning.”Had Alice said—yes, she’d asked last night if they would have time to speak.He had misunderstood the import of her words.If she’d asked Natalie to join them for the holidays, he would need to prepare another guest room, obtain gifts to make her feel welcome on Christmas morning— “I wish you would have apprised me of your ongoing phone conversations and this favor, Mother.”

Hands folded in her lap, chin high, she unleashed a serene motherly gaze that nonetheless chastised him.“And I wish you would have apprised me of the loss of Jay’s client.Mere days before my own heart troubles?It’s no wonder you can’t sleep.Providing Jay with comfort and support awakened old memories.And now to be right back here where it happened—”

“I really ought to fetch the last of the boxes.”The contest inside him grew, holds and pins and narrow escapes.Will had been far better at wrestling than he; Will could manage with raw strength what Henry must approach with evasion and cunning.“Alice and Jay will be bringing a tree home soon enough.”

Mother glanced at her phone, tipping it up from her folded hands.“They’ve only just reached the trees.Jay is looking adorably thoughtful while gazing at some sort of evergreen, and he’s sent a companion picture of Alice taking pictures of him.”The hard line of her lips softened as she pecked a response and lowered the phone.“We have eons of time to talk.”

“The opposite, I would think.They’ll be expecting your input.It’s not the best time, Mother.”The devastated child within couldn’t be allowed to gain the upper hand now that his spouses had arrived for the week.He must regain mastery over himself before he could properly tend to his responsibilities as a son, a husband, and a dominant.

Her sigh ushered in a hint of frost.“I think you would prefer we never discuss it again.”

“Need we?”Her insistence would upset the balance he sought.The match was hardly fair if she added her weight to the boy crying out for her to stay with him.“I assure you, I have thoroughly expunged that pain in assorted rounds of therapy.”

A vast overstatement, given the near fugue state he’d been in while drawing the other night.The fear had been a fogbank drifting closer and closer in the past two weeks, encircling him and clouding his view of anything beyond it.Alice and Jay’s arrival had brought not cleansing winds but another wave of fog.

He reached for a reliable light by which to steer the conversation elsewhere.“Father would undoubtedly have called such sessions unnecessary foolishness had I still been living under his roof.”

“And I would have called them a wise decision by my son with the old soul who feels life so intensely.”Thankfully, Mother never could resist the bait when it came to his relationship with his father.“If there is foolishness involved, it is only now, as you work so hard to deny the turmoil you are clearly experiencing.”

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