Page 8 of Ruck Me

Eoin: You just wantwhat?

Aoife: To know what I’m missing out on, okay.

Aoife: There, I saidit.

Aoife: I don’t have the faintest fucking clue what happens between a man and a woman and I’m sick and tired ofit.

Eoin: I imagine you have some idea. I mean, I’ve seen you kissing guys before.

Aoife: But that’s where it ends. Kissing.

Eoin: That’s it? That’s all you’ve done? No blow jobs or anything.

Aoife: I can’t believe I’m talking about this withyou.

Eoin: Too late to back out now. You’ve let the genie out of the bottle.

Aoife: No blow jobs. I’ve never even given a handjob.

Eoin: YOU’VE NEVER TOUCHED ADICK?

Eoin: You’ve seen a dick though, right?

Eoin: Right?

Aoife: Does on Tumblr count?

Eoin: Oh god, you’re killingme.

Eoin: Let me make sure I have the facts straight. You’ve never touched, much less seen, a dick up close and personal?

Aoife: That is correct.

Eoin: How?

Aoife: What do you mean, how?

Eoin: I mean exactly that. How are you 21 and never seen a real livedick?

Aoife: It just hasn’t comeup.

Eoin: Oh, I’m sure it’s come up. (See what I did there?) So, how’d you avoid it? You’ve had boyfriends.

Aoife: Not really. I mean, I’ve dated a few guys, but haven’t really *liked* any of them. If I couldn’t imagine myself holding a conversation with them, I wasn’t about to let them anywhere near my vagina.

Eoin: Please don’t say vagina.

Aoife: What would you have me say instead?

Eoin: Call it your pussy. Such a betterword.

Aoife: I’m not calling my vagina my pussy. Stop being such apig.

Eoin: I can’t help it. I love that fuckingword.

Aoife: No, you love *fucking* them.

Eoin: Thattoo.