Page 337 of Savage Bosses

“I know I need to explain what happened.”

“I’m all ears for your explanation.”

“Can we do this privately?”

“Why? Don’t want an audience to hear your sob story?”

I tried not to roll my eyes because I completely understood why Remy was acting like this. He was still hurt by what I’d done, so I needed to put myself in his shoes and have patience if I did want us to remain cordial.

“There was a reason to why I left.”

“Okay, I’m waiting to hear why.”

I took a deep breath and sighed. “Because I was scared.”

“Scared of what?”

“I was scared because I was losing myself with you.” Remy looked confused, as I turned myself to face him. “When we were together, there was so much that you were striving for. You were planning to start Delgado Industries, and I felt stuck. I didn’t have much going for me, and seeing you living out your dreams made me realize that I didn’t have everything all mapped out. I needed to find myself and being with you wasn’t going to help me do that.”

“That’s no excuse to why you up and left.”

“It was part of it but not all.”

“Then, what else?”

“I felt you were too concerned about your business than with our relationship. I felt you only cared about that and not how I was feeling during that time.”

“You’re being selfish, Porsha.”

“How so?”

“Because you were all I could think about during that time. I was building my business for us, Porsha, because I wanted for us to have a future. Yes, starting the company was hard and grueling and it took all of my time, but it was also preparing our life for the better. I wanted to see it succeed, so we wouldn’t have to struggle and live a good life.”

“Did you even care if I was struggling with my career choices then? I felt it was all about you and what you wanted and needed for your company. You never even asked my job aspirations or even if I was applying for positions then.”

“Porsha, you know I was your number one supporter. I wanted for you to go out there and do well with your publishing dreams. I was the one rooting for you to become an editor, maybe even become an author like you mentioned. I never stopped you from doing that. A part of me is even happy that you were able to fulfill that dream. But it could had been done sooner, but it didn’t because of you and your insecurities.”

I looked taken aback, as Remy took a deep breath. “All I’m saying is that I never stood in your way of pursuing your dreams either so, if you felt like I led you to take a back seat on your dreams, that was never my intentions to, but you should have looked at yourself in the mirror and figured out what you wanted out of your life then. Don’t use me as your scapegoat for not pursuing your dreams then.”

“Wow,” I mumbled.

But was Remy saying some truth about me not pursuing my dreams sooner? It’s not like I wasn’t. Maybe to a certain extent, I was scared to start my dreams because I figured I would fail. Or maybe it wasn’t even about my career at all. Maybe I was scared to be all in with Remy.

“Just be honest with yourself. Were you scared to live out your career or were you scared to live out your dreams with me?”

Remy got up and threw some money on the bar before staring at me. “You can’t answer that, can you?”

He headed to the door, making me feel sad and confused. Honestly, I didn’t know if it was worth continuing working at Oxford. Sure, I wanted the job, but I didn’t know if I wanted to be around Remy every day.

CHAPTER 7

Remy

W

hat a way to end the night! I was trying to avoid anything pertaining to Porsha, but from my family to even running into her at Teddy’s made me realize that there’s no escaping her. I was trying to keep my cool when it came to her but, after our conversation at the bar, I didn’t even know if I wanted to work with her. The story she gave me for leaving was total bullshit. If she didn’t want to be in a relationship, then she should had been mature enough to tell me she didn’t, instead of walking away.

After leaving Teddy’s, I went home and went straight to sleep. I didn’t care about reading over anything from Oxford or even my initial company; I just wanted to sleep the rest of the day away.