Page 78 of Sin and Redemption

“I’m pregnant.” I rubbed my still flat belly.

“Sara,” he murmured, his voice soft and warm. He came around the table and pulled me against him, kissing the top of my head.

We held each other for a long time, and with every passing moment of our closeness, I felt more at ease. Then he pulled back to search my face. Before he could say something, I asked, “Are you happy?”

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Our marriage didn’t start how it should have been. Sometimes I worry that I’m forcing you to have children.”

He shook his head, his hands coming up to cup my face. “You’re not forcing me to do anything. Before marrying you, having a family hadn’t been at the forefront of my thoughts, but it’s definitely been something I wanted, and you are the perfect woman to build a family with. You are caring and kind and loving.”

I bit my lip, unprepared for his compliments. Maximus wasn’t usually a man of so many words, so hearing him say it really made me emotional.

“Are you happy?” he asked quietly. My concern must have shown through my excitement. “I am. So happy, but I’m also really scared.”

Maximus’s brows drew together, the warrior in him rearing its head, ready to fight whoever scared me, but this was something he couldn’t beat with violence or threats.

“Scared of losing this baby as well,” I admitted. My voice broke even just considering the option.

“You won’t.”

“It’s still early. Only five weeks. So much can happen in the first twelve weeks and even after.”

“Sara,” Maximus implored, pulling my face closer to his as he bent down. Tears pressed against my eyeballs. I didn’t want to cry, not because of something that might not even happen, but my hormones were already intense. “Listen to me. Nothing will happen this time. Enjoy this pregnancy. Don’t let anything ruin it for you.”

I nodded. I wanted to enjoy every moment of it, but how could I when that dark cloud hovered over our heads?

“I hope you don’t still feel like you did anything wrong last time.”

I blew out a breath. I’d worked hard to let go of this idea, and I’d thought I had succeeded, but now that I was pregnant again and responsible for a growing life, all those feelings of guilt returned with a force. “I don’t know. It’s hard not to worry, not to blame myself.”

“It’s not your fault. I’ll repeat it as often as I have to until you feel the same way.”

I smiled, then tilted my head toward the food on the table. “Your meat will be cold by now.”

“Even a cold burger from you is better than anything I’ve ever eaten before.”

“Don’t let your mom find out!”

Maximus shrugged. “Mom knows you’re the better cook, and she adores you. Trust me, she’ll be more than happy to let you take over all the future cooking at family gatherings.”

I pushed him toward the table, touched by his words, especially that Cara really liked me. Now that we were becoming parents, it seemed even more important to be close to Maximus’s family. “Sit down and eat. You’ve had a long day.” I took the buns out of the oven and set them down in front of Maximus too, then heated a few patties in the microwave, even if it ruined the texture in my opinion.

“What about you? You need to eat too.”

I sat beside him and made a burger for myself, minus the beef patty. I hated ground meat and could rarely bring myself to eat it. Instead, I just put the chicken breast I’d cooked for myself on the bun.

Maximus watched me while he wolfed down three burgers as if they were the best thing he’d ever eaten. His love for my food really made me happy.

Even if I wasn’t particularly hungry and even felt a hint of queasiness, I forced myself to eat the entire chicken burger. This baby needed nutrients, so I’d give it to it.

“It’s good to see you eat. Maybe this time you won’t feel as sick,” Maximus said after he’d finished his third burger.

“I really hope that’s the case, but I feel like I’m already starting to be sensitive to certain tastes and smells, or maybe it’s just my overactive imagination.” I let out an embarrassed laugh.

“I’ll be by your side through it all. If you need something, just say the word.”

I bit my lip, touched by his words and also a bit guilty because I knew he hadn’t been part of my last pregnancy. He’d only experienced the sad end.

---