Page 123 of Crush

Would iteverbe over?

Yes. Zander was dead.

That same sentence kept replaying in my thoughts.

Because of you.

“Stop it,” Max suddenly said as he drew back and looked down at me. “I won’t tolerate it, Amber.” I usually welcomed his bossy side but the remorse I felt continued to churn through my insides. “He isn’t worth it.”

“I can’t help it,” I replied sadly. I knew he could read my thoughts. Max Hunter saw through all my bullshit. With him, I could no longer hide.

Part of me wanted to give this man my all but that other part was terrified of letting go.

“It’s over,” Max said, smoothing my hair back from my face. “And you are not to blame yourself.”

“How can Inotblame myself? A man is dead because of me,” I said, feeling the threat of tears. It was a strange feeling as I hardly ever cried. I hadn’t in years.

“No, a man is dead because he made some bad choices.”

“He wouldn’t have shot me, he said he loved me.”

“He was a sick fuck, Amber. He held a gun to your head for Christ’s sake.” His words brought it all back, he was right.

“Doyouthink he would have shot me?” I asked, my eyes wide as I searched his features. His beautiful face was black and blue with bruises and his lip was cut.

He looks like that because of you.

Max kissed the tip of my nose before drawing back. His expression was now serious.

“I honestly don’t know.”

My shoulders drooped and I felt sickness claw through my stomach.

“Do you think he ever loved me?”

This question caused Max to dash a hand across his face in frustration but he responded softly. Not wishing to upset me further, he was such a caring man. How had I not seen that in the beginning?

“Yes. In his own,perverseway, I imagined he did. But the man was unhinged.”

A long silence stretched between us before Max tugged me into his arms again and stroked my hair. I sunk against him, revelling in his strength.

Safe. You are safe now.Those words spoken by that counsellor were now true.

Alexander Harker is dead. And so is the past.

Max turned me gently in his arms and gave me a push towards my bathroom.

“I’m going to run you a bath. I’ll take a shower. Then you should try and get some rest. You look tired,” Max suggested from behind me.

I turned to face him, shaking my head. “No, I couldn’t sleep now. I’m too anxious.”

“And I understand that but you don’t need to be now, Amber. It’s over. And you’re going to move past it.”

Notwe’regoing to move past it. A jet of fear fizzled through me.

You’re too much of a headache, he’s going to walk away.

“Have your bath, get yourself cleaned up so you feel fresh. And then we can talk if you’re up to it.”

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