Page 101 of Morning's Light

She watched a bevy of emotions flash over Israel’s face, confusion to anger to bitterness and back again.

“Pass? Are you kidding me?” he asked, dumbstruck. “What do you mean, pass?”

“No, I’m not kidding. I’m sorry, Israel.” She shook her head ruefully. “There are more choices than I knew. I thought giving up what I wanted was the only way to play it safe.” She ducked her head to hide her smile. “It’s not true, Israel. This whole time I’ve felt like I wasn’t doing my part. It’s time for me to stand up for what I want and believe in. I only regret not realizing it sooner.”

A giddiness rose in her like the flickering of thousands of bird wings trapped inside her body. She loved Elon. She didn’t have to give him up, as she’d once thought. Her intentions had been honorable, but the sacrifice wasn’t necessary. She was a witch, goddammit. If she couldn’t protect the man she loved, then what good was she?

The realization empowered her and gave her the strength to do what needed to be done.

A small laugh escaped her, drawing a scowl from Israel. “You turn me down and you’re laughing? Are you kidding me? Woman, you are all kinds of crazy.”

She let the insult slip over her without impact. Her knees bounced, ready for the conversation to be over so the real work could begin. Convincing someone else of her sincerity. “Israel, it’s not you. I swear.”

He slammed his hand down on the bar, setting glass to tinkling. “Dammit, Aisanna, I’m asking you to marry me.”

“I know, and I’m sorry it has to end this way. I should have done us both a favor and ended things sooner. Unfortunately, with everything else going on, I didn’t want to focus on something I found inconsequential.”

Israel sputtered. “Inconsequential!”

“Not you. I mean this.” She circled her hands between them and got to her feet. “It’s a silly idea for both of us.”

“Yes, but—”

“There are no buts,” she told him sternly. “You don’t love me. And I don’t love you.”

“That’s a horrible thing to say to a man trying to give you a ring from Tiffany’s.” His face dropped, and Aisanna recognized once more what had initially drawn them together—the small hint of vulnerability behind those eyes. The only thing he tried to hide.

“I know, and I hate to do it to you.” She crossed the room and grabbed her jacket from where she’d flung it the night before. “We aren’t right for each other, Israel. You can go back to Zelda and do whatever it is you do with her. Send her my regards.”

With a defeated slump to his shoulders, Israel sank down on the couch she’d vacated. “I’ve never asked a woman to marry me before, and here I am getting turned down. Like a loser.”

“You aren’t a loser, Israel.”

He glanced up at her, brows furrowed. “It’s the human, isn’t it? The weakling from your shop. The one you work with, who punched me in the face.” He grimaced and worked his jaw. “He packs a wallop. I didn’t expect it of him.”

Aisanna smiled as she reached down to kiss the top of his downy head for the last time. She drew in his familiar scent, remembered the flames as they’d licked her and set the curtains ablaze. That was the past now. She didn’t need it. “Yes, it’s absolutely the human from my shop.”

Israel sighed, mouth turned down in a pitiful frown. “I hope you two will be happy playing house. I don’t see it, but what the hell.”

“Thanks. You’ll be fine,” she said, wrapping her scarf around her neck. Aisanna pulled the door open, and her mother nearly fell to the floor at the sudden jolt. “I had a feeling there were vultures waiting to swoop in for the feeding frenzy.”

“You aren’t getting married to Israel?” Varvara scrambled up in a most undignified manner. She smoothed her hair back and strove for nonchalance, watching him stalk past her and out the front door with his hands in his pockets.

Filled with the surety of her choice, she spun around and shot Varvara a warm grin. “No, Mom, I’m not. I have some business to take care of. Don’t wait up for me!” She hurried toward the front door, hopping while she tried to get her boots on. “I’m about to ask a Muggle to marry me.”

“A Muggle? What are you talking about?”

Aisanna skipped down the front stoop. The soles of her boots caught the ice and she windmilled to find her balance. Racing toward the garage, she pulled open the door to her mother’s car and checked the ignition for the keys.

“This is the craziest thing I have ever done!” She laughed at herself, scooting onto the cold seat and cranking the car. “The craziest damn thing ever.”

Everything happened for a reason. She believed that now.

Her heart had been in the right place, wanting to protect him and save him from a life of trouble. Now she saw that she deserved to be a little selfish. What was the point of fighting for Light if she couldn’t find her own happiness along the way? She’d left Elon alone and defenseless instead of finding the strength to stand up.

She pressed the accelerator down and navigated the streets as fast as safety allowed. She needed to see him. How would she be able to handle it if Elon decided to turn her away? Doubt crept in suddenly and she wondered if her feelings were true, if they were as real as she thought or a byproduct of her encounter the night before.

The thought of Darkness had her remembering Karsia and her black pupils. Aisanna should be working on a cure for her sister. Of course, the old Karsia would find the prospect of confronting Elon unbearably romantic. She would approve, Aisanna felt sure.

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