Page 97 of Bad for Me

Online: Ambrosiainthesun

Butterflies assaulted my stomach, and I took a generous gulp of my wine. For a moment, a flash of fury burned inside of me, wondering if she met with other women in a chatroom.

The same way you two met.

No, she wouldn’t do that. She had to hope I was online, too.

Jealousy raged through me at the thought of her fucking someone else, a jealousy that I had never, ever felt with Matt.

Fuck it, I clicked her name and typed, ‘Hi’ in the message box, hitting send.

She didn’t respond at first, so I sat back in the chair, curling my legs under myself and sipping my wine.

She was probably enjoying Thanksgiving dinner with her mother and not thinking about the fucked-up housewife she got mixed up with.

You know that’s not true; she went to great lengths to be with you.

Guilt throbs between my eyes, and my throat felt like it was closing. It was because I wanted to cry. And Ava Kelly never fucking cried.

As I allowed one tear to slip from my closed eyes, I heard the familiar ding of an instant message. I opened my eyes, and it was her.

Ambrosiainthesun:Go fuck your husband. You already made it clear he is who you want.

Ok, I deserve that one.

DeliverusfromAva:I’m sorry. Please, just talk to me.

Ambrosiainthesky:So, you can waste more of my time? I may still be in college, but I’m not some dumb teenager, and you should know that by now.

DeliverusfromAva:I know that you are incredible. Meet me at the cabin tomorrow. PLEASE.

Again, she went quiet on me, leaving me at my desk chewing my nails and refilling my glass for a third time.

Matt had spent a lot of time with his family lately, and he attended their family Thanksgiving without me. Maybe Mary and I could have our own little feast alone.

Ambrosiainthesun:Fine.

I almost jumped from the chair, but I didn’t want to spill my wine. I smiled to myself, letting out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

I will fix this. I will do what I should’ve done a long, long time ago.

* * *

Mary

I shouldn’t go, I should’ve just ignored the message all together.

But the pull to her was just too strong. She was a force, and she swallowed me whole.

Even the drive there was all-consuming. I gripped the wheel tight and drove too fast, rushing to the person who made my world feel a little less dark.

That’s what it was—she returned the feelings I had for her, equally. No matter how much she denied it. I couldfeelit. I knew it. She was just too busy lying to herself.

She had already forgiven me for my Chat Room catfishing, but she was the one who wanted it to be anonymous. Matt was the last piece in this that kept us apart.

Fuck that college, and fuck what people thought; I was a pro at starting over. I didn’t need that school, and I’d throw it all away to be hers.

As I pulled up, I noticed it was lit up like it never had been before, Christmas lights and large ornaments decorated around the deck on the front, a large Christmas tree in the corner.

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