Page 53 of For the Love of the Broken Man

“Take the keys because I’m within walking distance from here. Ask Pastor Stu how to find my place. I’ll take you home to your house after you’re done at the meeting,” Jase told him. He hopped out of the truck, shoving his hands into his pockets as he went north on Rolling Hills Lane.

Dan looked at the keys he was holding before he took a deep breath. It was yet another step for him to go to a meeting in his hometown. He’d gone a couple of times before going to rehab, but he hadn’t participated because he was doing what other people insisted he should. The meeting he was about to attend was definitely his coming out party in a whole different way.

Dan walked into the church basement where he knew the meeting was held, and he saw some familiar faces. When Pastor Stu walked up and extended his hand with a big smile, Danny took it in gratitude. The man had tried to help him, back when Danny refused to acknowledge the reality that he was living as an alcoholic, but he was still grateful for the pastor’s attempts.

“Hi, Pastor Stu. I want to apologize to you for how shitty—Uh, I mean…” Dan was stammering, knowing it wasn’t exactly appropriate to curse at a man of the cloth.

Pastor Stu held up his thumb, which had a black thumbnail. “See that? I blew an f-bomb when that hammer collided with my thumb. I was tryin’ to secure a shutter and it got away from me. We all drop a little coarse language from time to time, Daniel. How was Utah?”

“It was… exactly what I needed. I truly appreciate what you, Phil, and Javie tried to do for me, but I guess my skull’s thick enough I needed the tough-love experience. You’re my first amends, and I mean it, Pastor. I appreciate the help you offered, and I’m sorry I didn’t listen when you tried to give me a helping hand in the beginning.”

Pastor Stu shook his hand enthusiastically. “I accept your apology, Dan. I hope if you need anything, you’ll call me. Jason and Kayley have become regulars in my congregation. I hope you’ll find your way to joining them, but no pressure. One thing at a time,” the kind man told him as he walked to the front of the room to start the meeting.

Dan looked around, seeing Phil and Javie sitting in the row across from him. When they saw him, they quickly moved and embraced him. “Oh, God, I’m so glad you’re home,” Phil whispered as the three of them sort of rocked together.

“We’ve missed you, but your daughter has become our adopted niece and Jason? Geez, he’s great,” Javie said, his voice soft.

They all heard a throat clear, so they quickly sat down and turned to the front. “Now that I have everyone’s attention, I’d like to welcome you to…” And so, the meeting began.

After a few people stood to tell their stories, Danny took a deep breath before he stood to approach the podium. He thought about things for a minute because admitting his shortcomings... his addiction... to people he knew wasn’t easy. He assumed admitting things to people hedidn’tknowwouldn’t be any easier, but they were all there for a reason. Seeing one of the kids who worked for him at the Circle C made it all very real.

“Hi, my name is Danny, and I’m an…I’m an alcoholic.”

“Hi, Danny.”

He looked out at the crowd and didn’t feel judged. He felt accepted and supported, which was what he needed.

After the meeting, he went to the back of the room to get a cup of coffee. He was craving a cigarette, so he headed for the back door when he felt a peck on his shoulder.

He turned to see Adam Horvath, one of his ranch hands, looking concerned. “I’m goin’ out for a smoke? You wanna talk, come with me.”

The younger man, who was still in college and only worked at the ranch part-time, nodded as he grabbed his own cup of coffee and followed Danny upstairs.

They settled away from the group of smokers who were at the top of the stairs, and after Adam lit a cigarette of his own, he exhaled. “I heard you went to help at a ranch in Utah. One of Matt’s bulls was sold to a ranch out there, and you went to show the new owner how to train it for the rodeo circuit. That true?”

Dan chuckled. “Well, you heard me share, so you think that’s why I was in Utah?”

The younger man took a sip of the coffee, frowning. “Who makes this shit? It’s always burned. Anyway, will this hurt my job at the ranch? I’m goin’ to start vet school in the fall, and I hope to come back to the area to work with Bart. Do you think people will hold this against me?”

Dan was a little surprised. “How do you know Bart Grant?”

When Adam lifted an eyebrow, Danny laughed. “Jesus, how many fuckin’ queers live in this part of the country? Kid, this isn’t a big deal to me, obviously. When did you start drinkin’?” Danny knew the young man was about Jase’s age.

“Alcohol isn’t my vice. I was a drug addict when I was in high school…oxycodone. My parents sent my ass to rehab when I was sixteen and then moved me out here to live with my uncle so I could finish high school. They hoped being away from my old friends would make it easier for me. If only that was the case.

“I graduated high school with good grades and got admitted to UVA for my undergrad. I’m gonna attend Virginia-Maryland College of Veterinary Medicine in Blacksburg. I don’t want to fuck up my future, Dan. Bart and I met at a seminar he held regarding insemination programs, and we hit it off. I fell in love with him, and I don’t want to disappoint him.” Adam stood there and stared at Danny, likely waiting to be told he was fired. Of course, Dan wouldn’t hold the kid to a higher standard than he held himself.

“Adam, you got no worries from me. My lips are sealed, but maybe if you and Grant wanna get together with me and Jase sometime, we could get dinner or somethin’?”

The kid relaxed and nodded as they finished their smokes and coffee. They exchanged numbers before Adam went to his little Honda, waving at Danny before he got inside.

Dan felt a hand on his shoulder, turning to see Phil and Javie with bright smiles. “We’ve missed you! How was Utah?”

“How about we get together later in the week, and I give you the story? I need to see my girl. I had Jase drop me here, so rain check?” he asked.

Both men hugged him and nodded in agreement. Danny was surprised about how much acceptance he’d felt on so many fronts, but he wanted to get home to Kayley and Jase. They had a life to pick up, after all.

Chapter Twenty

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