Page 43 of Silent Cravings

I knew exactly what he meant. “You know I never had much of an example of how to be a good husband or parent,” I murmured, and he nodded. “But you did. I’m not saying things were perfect, but you at least had a good example.”

“I did,” he admitted.

“Here’s the thing,” I continued when he didn’t look convinced. “The fact that you’re so worried about being what she needs tells me you’re going to bust your ass to giveher everything you can because you want to do right by her. I’m no expert, but I think that’s a big part of making a good marriage. I know it sounds clumsy,” I admitted, laughing at myself. There was a reason I avoided getting into discussions like this.

He blew out a deep breath and shook his head, a grin playing over his mouth. “It doesn’t sound clumsy. You make a good point. So long as I don’t lose sight of what matters, everything will be fine. I only want her to be happy and never regret this.”

“Regret it? She won’t. Have you seen the way she looks at you?” I asked. “She’s been in love with you since we were kids, and you know it. And that hasn’t changed. Everything’s going to be fine.”

He lifted an eyebrow. “You wouldn’t be telling me that just because there’s an elaborate party waiting for us, would you?”

We shared a laugh, clapping each other on the back before leaving my office. He walked with his head high, with confidence I hadn’t seen from him all day.

It was no surprise the way my thoughts immediately went to Valentina. She made a point last night. I was in no mood to admit it then, but hours spent on my own after she kicked me out of her room had shed new light on my behavior. I was treating her like a warm hole to stick my dick in, and she deserved better than that. I shouldn’t have assumed we would sleep together, especially considering the way she treated me in bed on Thursday night. Was it my fault she never wanted to talk about anything? I didn’t like being left guessing at what her thoughts or feelings were.

I also didn’t like how much I still looked forward to seeing her, the anticipation building as we reached the lobby, immediately swarmed by guests.

The ceremony would take place outside in the garden, which now held rows of chairs draped with swags of roses, hydrangeas, and gardenias. The fragrance was overwhelming once I stepped outside in a navy suit matching those of the other groomsmen. I raised a hand to Miles, who was hanging out with his stepfather, Magnus, and Evelyn. Since Rose had wanted to keep things small and simple when it came to the bridal party, it meant leaving an odd number of groomsmen versus bridesmaids. He had gracefully stepped back, assuring Colton he didn’t need to be a groomsman, considering they hadn’t known each other for long.

The girls would be in a small room dedicated to the bridal party, and I wondered if Rose was nervous like her soon-to-be husband. One thing I knew and didn’t quite understand was how badly I wanted to find Valentina and tell her I was sorry for last night.

There had to be a way for us to work through whatever was between us. Sure, I could’ve brushed her aside and given up, but that would be a flawed course of action. After all, we would be part of each other’s lives for as long as Colton was my best friend, not to mention my friendships with Lucian, Noah, and Miles. There was no escaping each other.

Not that I wanted to escape her.

I couldn’t make heads or tails of my feelings, especially the knot squeezing my ribcage whenever I thought of Valentina as I strode out into the garden, greeting the Diamonds, the Blacks, and the Goldsmiths, making small talk while observing everything with a skilled eye. My staff was on their toes, ushering guests to their chairs and handing out sachets of rose petals to throw at the newlyweds once the ceremony ended. I spotted Bianca hurryingaround, whispering instructions, cool and collected. Valentina would be proud when she saw her.

With a few minutes to go until the scheduled start of the ceremony, Bianca caught my eye and gave me a nod. That was my signal. “Okay, let’s do this,” I told Colton, finding him talking with his parents. Grinning at Lourde, I added, “Don’t worry. I’ll take good care of him.” Her eyes shone with unshed tears when she nodded, gulping back her emotion while Barrett squeezed her closer.

We couldn’t have asked for a better day. The sky was deep blue without a cloud in sight, the sun warm but not too hot. The emerald lawn spread out gracefully in all directions, and in the distance, the lake sparkled invitingly. A soft breeze stirred the air and carried the fragrance of all those flowers.

Everything was perfect.

The deep satisfaction that realization brought me was unmatched by anything… but Valentina. There she was again, invading my thoughts, owning my awareness even as I fell in place behind my best friend moments before his wedding. Noah and Lucian stood behind me, and for a moment, I couldn’t help but look back on everything that led to this. Our friendship, everything we’d been through together as we learned to make our way in the world. I sure as hell never imagined being the best man at one of their weddings, mostly because I never imagined any of us settling down and getting married.

“You’ve got this,” I told Colton a heartbeat before the doors opened, and Sienna appeared on the veranda.

I was fairly sure Noah choked on his tongue at the sight of her in a tasteful peach dress that flowed and rippled in the breeze. She wore a cluster of gardenias behind her ear and carried a small bouquet of cream and peach roses tiedwith navy ribbon. The shy smile she wore once she spotted Noah left him catching his breath.

“Okay back there?” I whispered, grinning over my shoulder. “I thought the groom was the one who was supposed to lose it.”

“Maybe one day you’ll understand,” he murmured, staring at her as she walked down the white runner spanning the length of the garden. Aria followed her, and a glance at Miles told me he was having the same reaction Noah had. I was pretty sure his intense stare had him holding his breath too.

It was only when Valentina emerged that I understood. I rocked back on my heels before I could stop myself, my eyes glued to her as she walked slowly and gracefully down a handful of stairs, then down the runner. She held her head high like a queen, smiling at her parents once she found them and then again at her aunt and uncle sitting in the front row, close to where we stood.

Look at me.

Look. At. Me.

See me.

It took all of my concentration to keep a straight face when what I wanted was to run to her, to touch and smell her, and take her in my arms.

I was sorry for whatever I did.

I would tell her so.

I would tell her so many things.

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