Page 34 of Love Defies Us

He pulls me closer by my belt loop. My body brushes against his and I catch the tingles between my legs. Today, I wear a white tank top and denim shorts with my black Tom Ford flip flops. Nothing fancy. We stare at each other as if we’re gearing up for war.

“I’m not your sex toy anymore.” Fake confidence bleeds through my words.

“Newsflash for you, you’ll be whatever I want you to be to me.” He leans down and whispers, “I own your body and soul. I’m balls deep into your mind.” His voice tickles my ear.

He stands back up and his words pierce my heart. I want to respond; Ineedto respond, but I stand here frozen as if my feet are held together by blocks of ice.

“Stay for the bbq. Azrael can grill like nobody business.”

I want to say yes so bad, but I know how this night will end. Me in his bed again. Me trying to shake off my feelings. Me pretending that my heart doesn’t bleed when we’re apart.

“No.”

“I’ll keep my hands off of you.” And that, I know is a lie.

“I said no.”

“Stop avoiding me.”

“I’m not.”

“Alright, Pinocchio.” He shakes his head. “I called you every day and sent out text messages. You barely respond, and when I asked you can I come over, you lied and said you were out with your friends, but I saw you come out to the car to get a weird-looking bag.”

My mouth slightly opens and my cheeks flush. “Your stalking has no bounds.”

He cups my face as if he’s holding something precious and my bones feel like jelly.

“Not when it comes to you. Stop bringing out the creepy dude in me.” He pauses. “I’ll chase you, Sadie. Until the end of the world. I’ll never stop chasing you until you’re mine.”

In this moment, I don’t like Felix because he makes me feel as if I’m the only girl in the world and he makes me feel secure. Staring in his eyes, I say, “I want a relationship with you. I want you to be my very first boyfriend.” My words came out of the blue.

He sucks in a deep breath and the rough pad of his thumb rubs my cheeks. “Don’t break my heart, Sadie. I’ve been through enough shit already. They don’t call me a Broken God for no reason.” His words are concocted with caution. As if he doesn’t know if he can trust me with his heart. I want to prove to him that I’m not going to hurt him.

I nod.

“Give me your words.”

“I won’t break your heart.”

“Good.”

Then his soft pillow lips press against mine and a shiver picks at my spine. I slightly opening my mouth inviting his tongue into my mouth and our tongues do a tango. If our kiss was a weather, it would be rain on a hot summer day. Warm and wet. If our kiss was a song it would be Flaws and All by Beyoncé. Soft, elegant, and packed with so much emotion. He deepens the kiss and he grabs my ponytail. This is his signature move, and I don’t mind him pulling on my hair. My heart jumps for joy and overdoses on yearning. We pull away and I’m struck with dizziness as if I’m floating in air. Then he kisses my forehead. Then my cheeks. Then my nose. Then my neck. Sealing the deal that I’m officially his.

“Every god has a weakness and I just found mine.” He rests his forehead on my mine, and I close my eyes, bathing in this moment.

“It’s about damn time,” Aurora yells from the kitchen. We both turn to look at her. Easton leans against the arch doorway of the kitchen and Azrael stands next to him with a sandwich in his hand. Aurora is sandwiched between them.

“You two fucking disgust me,” Easton says. “If I hadn’t seen your dick before I’d swear you have a pussy for announcing your feelings to Trust Fund Baby.” He looks me up and down as if we’re aliens from another planet. He’s such an ass, I don’t know what women see in him. He could sacrifice a baby and women would still flock to him. Psycho ass.

Azrael bites into a sandwich and gives a thumbs-up. His version of approval.

“Y’all were spying on us the whole entire time?” I ask, taking a step back.

They all nod.

“Do they do this shit all the time?” I ask, folding my arms across my chest.

Felix shrugs. “They’re my family. They’re allowed to spy.”

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