Page 35 of Love Defies Us

“They better not spy on us when we’re fucking.” I deadpan.

“I would buy front row tickets to see that,” Azrael says between bites, “you’re so composed. I can’t imagine you moaning and letting loose, Sadie. Felix, let me watch. I want to see Sadie get wild. Let me stick the tip of my head in.” He’s dead-ass serious, I can tell by the way he eyes me if I’m a piece of meat. I glance over at Aurora, her face is colored with curiosity.

Felix’s shoulders tense and his jaw tics. “Fuck no. And if you ever say some dumb shit like that again, I’ll beat your ass.”

My eyes venture back to Azrael, his eyes are the size of the moon. “You’re high,” I tap my foot and place my hands on my hips. “You better sober up before the tour or the band will go on without you,” I say. “You need to be in rehab.”

“I always stop using coke, I smoke weed.”

“That’s not sobering up,” I scold.

Felix slaps me on the ass, and picks me up and I giggle, “I’m not hungry for bbq. I got something else to eat.”

We head to his bedroom.

Three weeks later…

Days begin to mesh together. After me and Felix decided to be in a relationship. We came out on social media. Well, Felix came out and tagged me in it. And his fans made us a hashtag. #BrokenGodandBossLady

Everything has been going great in our relationship. I’m sitting at the bar with Axel and Jasper. I promised Axel that I’d hang out with him. Our work schedule is crazy since Dad forced him to be CEO. He started a week ago and people in the office haven’t been as uptight as usual. Then again, when you work for an uptight boss that walks around with a stick up his ass, you wouldn’t have any energy to work for them.

I sip my peach Long Island tea. A dark skinned-woman with pink hair sings a soul song on stage. The bar is more dead than a corpse. A few people linger on the dance floor and the lights are dim causing my eyes to strain. Nothing fancy like I’m used to.

“I need to meet Felix,” Axel says, and his words catch me off guard “I need to see if your new boyfriend is right for you. Has Dad put that shotgun to his back and told him to do right by you yet?”

My brother wears a black cotton shirt and blue denim jeans.

“Um no. I’ve been avoiding our parents,” I say before sipping my fruity drink. The alcohol soothes my throat and goes frantic in my bloodstream.

“I’m surprised that Jasper approved your relationship with him,” he says, and I glance at him with confusion. He sips from his beer and stares at Jasper, and Jasper glares at him as if you better not say shit or I’ll kill you. What is this about?

“Why wouldn’t he?”

“Because he’s i—”

I hear a thump under the table, and I look between Jasper and Axel. Jasper cuts his eyes to him and my brother has a smug look on his face.

“Are you too keeping secrets from me?”

Jealousy eats at me like a zombie snacking on a human. I thought Jasper and I shared everything. Apparently not.

They don’t answer my question.

I study the two. I know Jasper hangs out with Axel from time to time and they’ve gone to work out at the gym a few times. They’re friends, but not as close as me and Jasper.

“You better tell me what’s going on,” I say to the both of them as I take another sip from my glass.

“Nothing,” Jasper answers, his face stoic.

“Are you happy that I’m with Felix?” I ask Jasper. Ever since it came out that we’re dating, Jasp doesn’t give his input on our relationship like he did before. He doesn’t seem so happy, and he just hit me with that “Oh.” And he’s been moody lately. Last week, he got upset because I told him that he forgot to wash the dishes. I didn’t say anything because I thought it had to do with his lovers.

“Yes.” Jasper clears his voice. He lied to my face. Every time he lies, he rubs his nose repeatedly and that’s what he’s doing now. Rubbing his pointy nose as if he’s a cokehead.

I don’t get why he isn’t happy with me being with Felix. I’m not going to hound him. If he wants to talk about his feelings, he will.

“I’ve got to go. Don’t want to keep James waiting.” My brother takes out his leather wallet and throws a ten-dollar bill on the table.

He kisses me on the cheek and pats Jasper on the back, then leaves. It’s just me and Jasper. And it’s awkward. Too awkward.

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