But I can’t do any of that. I need to be strong, for Aisley. Always for my daughter.
Mom beams at me before chirping, “Why am I being graced with my two favorite girls?”
“We came for your goods, your baked goods,” Aisley shots back at her without even missing a beat.
I share a look with my mom, full of amusement, before we both laugh at my sassy daughter. Fuck. Andrew would find her hilarious.
A pang of loss and loneliness hits my chest. I try to push it away, but it’s almost impossible.
“Yeah,” I choke out, “what she said.”
“Well, we can’t have my girls starving.” Mom makes a sweeping gesture toward the display case, not caring at all about the other people waiting in line. “Have a look. I think I might have a few more orange rolls in the back too,” she whispers the last bit like it’s a secret.
Aisley squeals, since Mom’s orange rolls are her favorite. She’s out of the main room of the bakery and in the back before I can even blink.
Just as I take a step to follow my daughter, Alpha Whitaker breaks through in the mind link,“Nyx.”
“Yes, Alpha?”I try to not sound scared or nervous, but it’s not easy. It’s a rare occurrence for me to be linked by the Alpha.
Actually, I can’t remember the last time it happened. My stomach explodes with butterflies. Is there some sort of emergency? Did I do something wrong?
If Dad was injured during warrior training, Mom would have been contacted. Right? I think so.
My mind is whirling so bad while my wolf paces in my mind, not helping matters, I almost miss it when Alpha links again. “Let me start by saying, there’s nothing wrong. No one is hurt. This is not an emergency.”I breathe a sigh of relief, a very small one.“I would like you to come to my office as soon as you’re available.”
“Um,”I almost stumble over my thoughts and my words,“of course. I was just bringing Aisley to the bakery for some breakfast. She can hang out here while I come and meet with you.”
“Great,”he sounds relieved and I’m not sure how to take it. His voice takes on a sheepish tone,“Do you think you could grab one of Maggie’s orange rolls for Tilly? She loves them.”
I giggle softly. It’s cute that he wants to get a treat for his mate. Ignoring the stab of pain that’s soul deep, I assure him,“Of course. They’re Aisley’s favorite too.”
“Thank you,”he breathes out, clearly relieved.“I’ll see you soon.”
Mom is looking at me curiously when the link closes and my attention shifts to her. I nibble on my lip before blurting, “AlphaWhitaker wants to meet with me?” Relief floats across my mom’s face and I have no idea why. I shake it off because I can’t take that on as well right now. “He also asked me to bring an orange roll for Luna Tilly.”
Mom grins from ear to ear before nodding and moving back behind the display case. She starts boxing up a roll for Luna Tilly while asking the next person in line what they would like. I’ve always loved watching Mom work. She does it with a grace and ease that would make a fairy jealous.
I go and let Aisley know that I’ve been called to a meeting at the packhouse, not wanting her to worry about me meeting with the Alpha. She barely even waves at me because she’s too focused on the roll she’s eating. It’s almost as big as her head, but I know she’ll put it down without a problem.
Hell, she’ll probably ask for a second one knowing her.
I kiss the top of her head before heading back to the front of the bakery. Mom’s smile is reassuring and full of love as she points to box. I grab it, take a deep breath, and then head over to the packhouse.
The entire time I’m walking, it feels like I could look to the side and find Andrew walking right next to me. But I know he’s not there. He’s never there anymore; hasn’t been for three years.
Three years.
It amazes me that it’s been that long since he died.
It should have been me.
“No,”my wolf startles me with her growl, full of authority and censor.“It should not have been you.”
“It shouldn’t have been him either,”I point out. I know, having had this conversation with her more than once, she doesn’t have anything to say in response to that point.“If he hadn’t been worried about me, if I hadn’t insisted on going to protect the pack as well, he wouldn’t have been distracted. His death is my fault. One day I’ll have to tell Aisley about why she’s grown up without a father and I’ll lose her too.”
“It wasn’t our fault. We had to fight. We trained to be out there and defend our pack, just like mate did,”my wolf points out even though I know the death of our mate hurts her just as much as it hurts me.“He knew we were capable,”she grumbles.
I shriek in response,“So it’s his fault?”