Page 141 of Forbidden You

Fuck, she’s so beautiful.

Quickly, her face falls, and she swallows hard. The air becomes thick, sticky against my skin, as a cold sweat breaks out over my spine.

Her pretty eyes widen, staring at me with so much hurt, it cuts me deep and painful. Without saying a word, she covers her face with her hands, shaking her head.She knows.

“Don’t do this, Bodi,” she says when her hands fall to her sides. “Don’t ruin this.”

Doesn’t she know it was doomed from the beginning?

I can’t be that guy.

“What do you want me to say, Kayla?”

“The truth!” she shouts, her anger rising from zero to a hundred within a split second.

“I told you I don’t date.”

“Newsflash,baby,” she snarls, “we are way past the dating phase.”

Her fierceness is a force to be reckoned with, once again fucking with my head. She’s going to make someone one lucky bastard someday, and I will make sure he remembers it every chance he gets.

I shake my head, but before I can say anything, she gets in my face, glaring up at me like she’s ten feet tall.

“No? Then what are we?”

“We’re friends,” I tell her firmly.

“Friends?” she parrots sarcastically. “I was never your friend, Bodi. And you were never mine. That was just a bullshit excuse, and you know it.” She pricks her pink painted fingernail in my chest. “Tell me you don’t feel anything for me.”

“I do.” I feel too much for her, that’s the whole problem. “But I told you I don’t date.”

“Why?!” She grips her head in frustration. Her eyes are tenacious with pain, killing me on the inside. I hate seeing her like this. I just want to yank her against my chest and tell her everything will be alright, but I can’t.

I can’t make her promises I can’t keep. I can’t tell her I will give her a happy ending. I can’t do that to her. I can’t feed her lies about how we’ll be together forever when I know it has the possibility to break me. I can’t fall. I refuse to fall.

“It always ends, baby.” I take her face in my hands, but she swats my arms away, turning on the spot to create some distance.

“It doesn’t have to end,” she says, her head shaking.

See, and that’s where she’s wrong. That’s where she’s young, and still willing to believe the fairytales people tell us, but I know better. I know how life altering giving your heart to someone can be, and I decided a long time ago that wasn’t for me.

“Italwaysends. Italwaysfucks with your head, and I can’t have that.”

“You know what I don’t get?” She turns around to face me again, her hands on her hips while her eyes narrow to small slits. “You set up Jensen and Rae. You pushed him to get out of that bullshit relationship. You pushed him to fight for Rae. You pushed him to get out of his comfort zone. Youfuckinghelped me get them back together!”

“I know!” I shout back.

“Then how can you not do the same for yourself? Why are you standing there like a coward, pretending there is nothing going on between you and me? It’s not fair, Bodi! It’s not fair to you and it’s certainly not fair to me!”

“You’re right,” I concede, rubbing the back of my neck. “There is a lot going on between you and me. I can’t deny that.”

“But?” I watch how her eyes grow moist, and my body vibrates with how much I hate this.

“But I don’t want to pursue it.”

“I see.” Her voice is small. Smaller than I’ve ever heard it. Too small. “Because I’m not worth it.”

“No!” I blurt with a pinched expression. “No, it’s not y—”

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