Page 65 of The Bull's Head

“I am. Hiram….” Ivan averted his gaze. “He had me do things on my own. Bad, terrible things. I went because he demanded it, but also because my bear enjoyed the kill.” He grimaced. “So you see, my kitten is not wrong to wish me to leave. I am unworthy of him.”

Teddy scoffed. “This isn’t the Ivan I know. When he wants something, he will find a way to get it. You say you’ve done bad things in the past. Have you done anything like that since Damon became our leader?”

“No, but?—”

“Stop. There is no but. You’re a man with a heart. You said it yourself, you wished to get revenge for the little ones. Is it also possible that you sought retribution for the things that Hiram made you do?”

Ivan still wouldn’t look at Teddy. “Perhaps. Still, my bear desires to inflict pain.”

“I call bullshit. If Jerome was someone your bear wanted to take out, you’d do it. Your bear wants to love him, to protect him. That’s what a mate is.”

Ivan’s head snapped up. “He told me to leave!”

“Of course he did,” Teddy soothed. “He’s in a great deal of agony, brother. They took his eyes, removed that which he believed connected him to the world. His anguish is great, as is his fear. He has been hurt so much, he only wishes to avoid more of that. He thinks everyone will bring him pain, so it’s easier for him to push people away.” He reached out and gripped Ivan’s shoulder. “Don’t let him get away from you, because I know you will forever regret it.”

Ivan nodded, then chuckled. “I was certain you would tell me I couldn’t have a mate. I’ve gotten laid by the most beautiful men and women around, so who’d want a manwhore for a mate? When I came here and met Jerome, there was no one else for me.”

“It gets better after you claim him,” Teddy assured Ivan. “Byk is part of my heart now, and I can’t remember when he wasn’t.”

“Do you think I have a chance with him?” Ivan wondered, his voice cracking.

“Do you think you have a chance without him?”

Ivan’s shoulders slumped. “What if you’re wrong?”

“Am I ever?”

Ivan’s eyes widened. “You did not just say that. I can name many times you have been.”

“I’m not wrong. Ask yourself. Has Jerome been around you in cat form? His animal would be yowling for you, but I think Jerome has cut himself off from that part of his life. It’s up to you to help him find it again.”

Ivan stood and drew in a deep breath. “Thank you, Theodore. You have given me much to think on.” He leaned in and brushed their cheeks together. “I need my mate.”

“Of course you do. And don’t think we won’t be discussing what Hiram had you do.”

Ivan’s face went scarlet. “I would prefer we not.”

“We will,” Teddy vowed. “And so you know, it’ll never change how I feel about you.”

A weak smile. “You’d be surprised.” He put his hand on Teddy’s side and shoved him gently. “Go back to your Byk. He needs you more than he admits.”

“I love you, Ivan. You know that, right? I will always love you. When we got to America, you protected me. Kept me safe and wouldn’t let me be afraid. It’s because of you I’m the man I am.”

Ivan waved a hand. “Oh, no. You cannot blame that mess on me.” He grinned. “If I had anything to do with the person you’ve become, it’s me who is grateful. I love you as well, brother. Now go. And Teddy? I love your Byk as well. He is perfect for you.”

And he was. The time had come to show him how perfect.

Chapter 21

Several days later, after more batteries of tests that led to no new insights, Byk was beyond frustrated. He’d been poked, prodded, bent, twisted, and manhandled by so many people. It had taken everything in him not to shift and run. No, that wasn’t true. One look into Teddy’s amazing eyes relaxed him enough to let the doctors do their work.

He was grateful when they finished and told him they were done for the day. He figured Teddy would take them back to their room for rest, but apparently he had other things in mind.

“Do you trust me?” he asked.

“Absolutely,” Byk answered, without a moment of doubt.

Then he produced a strip of cloth he slipped over Byk’s eyes. “Come with me,” he said, taking Byk’s hand. Several minutes later and they still hadn’t arrived at wherever Teddy was leading them.

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