Page 34 of Raze

“You can’t leave and you can’t ignore this, Raze.”

“I have to.” Even my words come out fuckin’ weak as I grab her shoulders and shift her out my way. I pick up my bag and I’m almost at the door before she calls after me.

“There’s been no one since him.” My feet freeze to the spot, giving her the chance to catch up and put herself right back in front of me.

“He was the last person I had touch me, he was the last person I had inside me.” She stutters on her breath as she explains. “I liked how it felt when you started replacing all that,” she confesses, unable to look me in the eye because she’s still ashamed of what that asshole did to her.

“Look at me.” I like that she instantly does as I tell her. Though, seeing her big, green eyes magnified with unshed tears makes my heart split in two.

“You never be embarrassed of what that man did to you, that's his shame to bear, not yours.” I can’t help touching her even though I shouldn’t, the tear that runs over her cheek don’t belong there. He’s not worthy of it.

“I wish I could be the person to heal ya darlin’ but I’m not,” I whisper as I wipe it away. “You're young and there’s a whole world out there for you to see. You don’t belong here, and you sure as hell don’t belong with me. I’ll be back in a few days,” I tell her sadly, leaning forward and placing a kiss on her forehead before I head out the door and go back to the clubhouse.

It’s a few hours later when we got the cage loaded up and all the members in the parking lot. A few of the whores are out here to see us off, but there's no sign of Peyton, and I have to ignore the sinking feeling that puts in my stomach.

“What kinda point you tryin’ to make here, Prez?” Wrath asks me under his breath while all the brothers who are coming saddle their bikes. “You know I should be on this run, I’m your V fuckin’ P.”

“Which is why you should be here, takin’ charge while I’m away,” I point out.

“Nah, that's bullshit, there ain’t nothin’ to take charge of here.”

“Well then, catch up on some reading and spend the next couple days gettin’ your dick sucked.” I shrug as I take my own saddle. I’ve known Wrath a lotta years. There was a time when we were closer than brothers. I know that look on his face. He wants to drag my ass into that fight pit and attempt to kick the shit outta me, but today’s not Wrath's day for that.

I look behind me and check that Rocco is ready, and once he gives me a thumbs up from the driver's seat of the cage I start my engine, revving the throttle so everyone knows it’s time to leave.

“Wait….!” I hear a voice scream over all the engines as they vibrate the walls around the yard and when I look in my side mirror I see Peyton, running through the gate that leads down to the beach and coming straight for me. She’s all outta breath when she gets to me, but that doesn’t stop her sliding her hand behind my head and pressing her lips tight against mine. She kisses me in the yard in front of my whole club, and I got no choice but to kiss her back because I’m feelin’ nothin’ but relief and my willpower has up and fuckin’ gone.

“I don’t care what you think. I am here, Raze, and I do belong to you,” she whispers with her cheeks flushing pink and her eyelashes batting. Then turning back around she races back off the way she came.

I’m fully aware that everyone around us will have witnessed what just happened, but I don’t care as I kick down my stand and get off my bike, marching behind her and calling her name.

She stops, looking fearful as she turns around and I approach her. I snatch all the breath outta her body when I pick her up, wrap her legs around my hips, and slam her against the back wall beside the gate.

“I’m president of this club and you don’t get to come out here and claim me like that in front of all my members,” I growl under my breath at her

“Oh god, that wasn’t what I… I was ju—” I shut her up when I smash my lips over hers, scrunching up her soft, brown hair in my fist and kissing her in front of everyone who’s watching so they know for sure that this girl is mine.

My tongue dances around hers, getting one last taste of her before I hit the road.

“We’ll talk about this when I get back.” Gripping her jaw and in my hand, I stare into her round, bewildered eyes, before placing her back on her feet and heading back to my bike.

I ignore all the claps and whistles I get from my brothers as I saddle up and lead us out.

Itouch my fingers to my lips and still feel the friction from his. Raze got the wrong idea about what just happened. I wasn’t trying to claim him. I just couldn’t let him leave without him knowing how I felt. I know Raze feels what I do, I felt it last night in the way he kissed me and how he treated my body like it was something special to him.

I’m not some stupid, little girl who doesn’t know what she’s getting involved in. I know how dangerous a motorcycle club can be. But what just happened was above all my expectations and I feel a little light-headed from how happy I am.

The women who hang out here and make themselves available to all members are scowling across the yard at me, so I quickly turn around and head back toward the beach. It stated something that he kissed me in front of everyone with no intention of hiding it, and although he seemed a little mad, I saw the promise in his eyes when he said we’d talk when he gets home. He said he’d be gone for a few days, and as sad as it is to admit, I already miss him. At least some weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

I don’t want to run from this anymore. I’m already starting to see this place as my home, I just choose to ignore how complicated that makes everything.

I arrive back at the hut feeling so much better than I did when I left it and since I didn’t get much sleep last night I decide to tuck myself into bed and take a nap. My head has barely touched the pillow when I hear a loud bang, followed by a squawk. I get back up and rush to the door where it came from and through the glass I see a raven lying still on the porch.

It must have flown into the door, and when I lean over to check for any signs of life, I jump out my skin when it quickly shakes its head and struggles back up.

“It’s okay. I won’t hurt you,” I speak softly as it bounces on its claws and flaps one of its wings desperately trying to take off. “I think you’ve hurt your wing.” He’s only holding the other one-half open. “Stop flapping and I can help you.” I look around for something I can put him in. It looks to me like a few of the members have stayed behind, maybe I can convince one of them to drive me to a vet’s or a wildlife rescue center. The poor creature is exhausting itself trying to take off under the midday sun and I quickly grab some bread to try and entice it indoors, but it doesn’t seem to work.

I have no phone or way of googling what to do in this situation and so I have to run with instinct. I head back into the kitchen and fill a bowl with water, then placing it on the floor in the middle of the hut I surround it with the breadcrumbs I’ve made. There’s an old whiskey crate that Raze keeps his shoes in by the door, so I empty it out. Stepping back out onto the porch, I block the bird from the beach and shoo it into the house. I wave my arms and encourage it toward the water bowl. Then once it starts to peck at the bread crumbs I quickly trap him there with the crate.

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