Page 47 of Control

“How did you do that?” she asked. “I never knew you could just anoint someone at random like that.”

“You can’t,” I said, pressing my lips together. “It’s a one time thing.”

“Then how?” she asked me. “Does this have anything to do with you being off the map? Why we couldn’t locate you?” I nodded my head. “Where were you?”

“That’s a little complicated,” I said to her as the crowd around us began to move to the music again and talk about the scene, some of them walking over to offer us more kind words. Caster and Giff had moved off the dance floor and away from us to discuss something while staring back at me. Cris and Mustafa also gave Reyna and I some space, but kept a close watch. They were all still confused as to what had just transpired so I knew I was going to eventually have to explain to them what I was telling Reyna.

“Tell me,” she said to me as she took my hand and led me away to another area closer to the back of the club.

“I have a better idea,” I said. Pairing with her, I thought of the most serene and private place I could think of. In an instant, she and I were in my stargazing room, the pond of ducks and geese just to our left and the bench I’d spent some time lying down next to earlier in the night to my right. I led her over to it, but neither of us sat down. We were both still full of adrenaline and giddiness from our experiences.

“I was given an opportunity,” I said as I quickly glanced up to the stars and then back down to her. I took a deep breath and began explaining. “I talked to…someone…and I told them I didn’t want my title anymore. I told them I wanted to give it up because having it caused someone very dear to me to leave Aurora.” Reyna sighed as I told this to her. “I told them it had been more of a curse than a blessing and I wanted to be rid of it. They told me I could willingly give it up to whomever I thought was worthy, but once I did that I could never get it back. Ever.” Reyna thought about my words for a moment.

“Wait,” she said, figuring out exactly what I was saying. “Are you saying…you asked to give you title up?” I nodded my head. “And you decided to give it…to me?” I nodded again. “Why!”

“I had to,” I said, pulling her closer to me and placing my hand on her cheek. “You were all I wanted for so long and you ended up leaving because of it.” I looked down to Reyna’s hand and took hold of it, lifting it up to my chest. “Since that day, I’d hated it. All I wanted was for us to just be able to do our thing and be together. I never wanted the title so when I was given the chance to give it up, I took it with one condition. I got to choose who that person I picked would be called.”

“So you chose to call me Butterfly,” Reyna said to me, a light smile breaking out across her face.

“Yes,” I said. “Because to me, that’s what you are. You evolved in front of my eyes. I remember you being so into your kink at the beginning that it became a refuge for you. But then as we spent more time, you began to change and become something more.” I pulled her hand to my lips and kissed it. “When you came for me in Stormfront, all you did was prove to me what I already knew. You put yourself in danger to come and get me. You stayed with me when they chased me and you put yourself in front of me when that asshole came at us with a knife.”

“I wanted to do it,” she said to me in a lower voice. “I…abandoned you once and I wasn’t going to do it again.” Reyna looked over to the pond as did I. Watched for a moment as the ducks quietly moved through the water, their little feet carefully moving them along.

“I was never mad at you for leaving,” I said looking back at her. She, in turn, looked back at me. “I was never mad. Just…alone. It fractured my mind for a while because I knew what was happening inside me. I knew I was falling for you. Hard. And I couldn’t stop myself.”

“Ana,” Reyna said, apparently trying to stop me from saying more.

“Hey,” I said, interjecting. “I know you don’t do romance and relationships. I remember when we talked about all that and I get it. But…I just had to say it. I had to let you know how I felt. And I’m not expecting you to just change your perspective on all that. It was never my intention to try and change your mind.” I looked back down and dropped my hand from her face. “Before you left, I had made up my mind I would just never tell you. I told myself to just be happy with what we had. And I was. We had an amazing friendship. We did some of the wildest stuff together! There’s no way you can’t feel close to someone you experienced all that with. There’s just no way. The level of trust I felt with you was….”

Without warning Reyna pulled me to her, wrapping her hand around the back of my neck and pressing her lips to mine. She kissed me gently, but with conviction as if wanting to let me know there was far more going on inside her heart than she’d led on. I closed my eyes and let myself sink into her, letting her passion encompass me and allowing myself to feel all I’d been holding in for the past year and a half.

“I never wanted to leave,” Reyna said, interrupting our kiss. Not knowing what to say to her, I kept quiet and waited to see if she wanted to add more. “I left, but I didn’t tell you exactly why. Yes, the attention you got was overwhelming, but that wasn’t the reason. I left because I knew if I stayed I was going to break that rule I had set for myself. No love, no relationships.” Just then, Reyna’s eyes glassed up and she confessed more to me. “I never thought I could fall for someone in a place like this, but then you came along and before I knew it, I was walking around in the real world and thinking of you and counting the minutes before I could see you again. All I could think about was you. When I was at work or when I was sitting and talking to friends, it was always you.”

“Reyna,” I said, realizing what she was saying to me.

“ I couldn’t stay because I was scared!” she said as she put her arms around me and pulled me closer, touching her forehead to mine. “I thought if I just leave, I could get over this or realize it was just me being dumb. But then I realized I had never stopped thinking about you. Every day, every damn day I would go home and remember that I couldn’t see you because I had to get over it. I couldn’t come back!”

“Then why did you?” I said, pressing my forehead into hers. I could feel my heart pounding and I could, with my newly gained powers, feel her pulse rising as well as her blood pressure.

“I can’t let you go,” Reyna said. She pulled back a little from me and we locked eyes, hers finally releasing the tears I knew she’d been holding onto for the last 18 months.

“You don’t have to,” I said back to her, softening my voice. She reached her hand up to my face and lightly touched my cheek as if afraid she might harm me. We stared at each other, neither of us blinking much as she smiled through her tears.

“Ana,” she said, still caressing my cheek with her fingers. “So…what do we do about all this? Where do we go from here?” Reaching my hand up, I wiped away a couple of tears with my fingers and smiled at her.

“I’m in if you’re in,” I said, making it plainly clear what I wanted. Reyna’s smile grew as she nodded to me. “You know, Reyna. We’d never…actually had a proper kiss before.” She giggled a little, knowing what I meant. “I mean…we’d kissed, but it was always in the context of our…adventures. It was never just us. Never me and you just doing it because we wanted to or….” Reyna interrupted me with a quick and loving kiss, pressing her lips into mine once more and taking me by surprise. She just as quickly pulled back, our lips making a audible smack as she did. I smiled wryly and closed my eyes for a moment, enjoying the sudden showing of affection. “Can we try that again?”

Reyna nodded to me, allowing me to let my pent up emotion for her finally show. I pulled her to me, gently brushing my lips against her nose. Kissing her again, I could feel the texture of her lipstick colliding with my own. I felt her tongue peek out of her mouth and gladly accepted it, letting my own return her oral affection. Before I knew it, we were wrapped around each other, our kiss being the culmination of an extremely intense and whirlwind type relationship that almost ended tragically. It was the first time we’d ever properly kissed and it was one of the most beautifully intense and loving moments of my life. This woman whom I’d longed for, ached for, for so long was finally in my arms. In that moment, we let out all the pent up loss, heartache, uncertainty, sorrow and fully embraced what we both wanted - each other.

I’d been able to get answers to so many questions I’d had for so long not only about Reyna but also about myself that night. Never in all my years had I thought I could fall in love with another woman until she came into my life. I’d never looked at another woman the way I looked at Reyna, dedicating virtually all of my time to men as far as romantic prospects were concerned. It was devastating for me not only when Reyna had left, but also because I had let myself get comfortable with the idea of loving a woman only for it to end the way it did. When I fall in love, I fall hard. Very hard. It was the same way with Will and much more apparent with Reyna, only I knew she would never get jealous and try to end my life.

We kissed and let our hands roam over each other’s bodies. I imagined what everyone would think of what was happening with the two of us. I knew people would talk and I knew they would find some reason to criticize what happened with us that night, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was Reyna. I ran my fingers through her thick, dark hair and caressed her dark skin with my fingers, each touch feeling like the first time. It felt like a whole new beginning for Reyna and I, and in a way, it really was. We’d been through so much and dealt with our own heartache and uncertainties, but still managed to find our way back to each other. Only this time, we were moving forward with our lives, at least in Aurora, as a couple. If we decided to revisit our old kinks at some point, we could talk about it and then work out how we wanted to approach it. Neither of us ever got jealous and when it came to taking sides, I knew she always had my back and she knew I had hers. We were a team then and we’d become an even stronger team after and we both knew nothing could tear us apart.

CHAPTER 13 - OUTRO

A FEW WEEKS had passed and nothing had come out as far as the personal data that had been stolen. No other statements had been released so everyone had started to become strangely comfortable with the fact that all their personal information could be released at any moment. In the real world, the hack had been major news for a couple of days, but even that eventually cooled off and things went mostly back to normal. As a society, we’ve grown so used to having our data stolen that most people had simply assumed it would or could be stolen at any moment.

Me releasing all my information on purpose did have negative consequences for me but nothing terribly concerning. A few people local to me did get curious and came by my apartment building, but thankfully the on site security took care of them. Apparently one person from out of state did attempt to make contact with me, but he was warned not to return which, from what I understand, he hasn’t. I wouldn’t know first hand because the day after it all went down, I was contacted by one of Thaddeus’s people and they arranged to have me moved immediately for my own safety. It was a hassle to have to pack up and go within a few hours, but I only took necessities as they advised me they’d have a moving company come and pack up my apartment for me. I wasn’t happy to have individuals I didn’t know going through all my things, but I did do this to myself. Thaddeus was just trying to help.

---