Page 151 of A Touch of Chaos

“The closets in your other houses or the closets in this house?” Dionysus asked. It was an important distinction.

“The closets in this house,” said Hermes. “If the shoes aren’t here, then we’ll have to check another house.”

Dionysus rubbed his face in frustration. “Why do I put myself through this?” he groaned.

“Because you secretly love hanging out with me,” said Hermes, sauntering past him. They left the pink room and entered a blue room, which was not amongthe colors Hermes had mentioned earlier and only made Dionysus far more worried. When the shoes were not there, they moved on to another. This one was purple and had more than just shoes in the closet but still no winged sandals.

As more hours passed, Dionysus began to wonder if Hermes still had them and started to consider other options for reaching the island of Thrinacia. He worried that by the time he managed to get the shoes and bury the ophiotaurus, it would be too late to rescue Medusa, but he did not have many options. He did not have a monster that could fly, and one that could swim would be just as dangerous as sailing given Poseidon’s hatred of him.

Even with Hermes’s sandals, there was a chance he’d be shot down from the sky by pirates, but at least his odds of landing closer to Medusa were better.

Those were the thoughts racing through his mind as he sank to the bed in the green room and nodded off.

He wasn’t sure how long he was out when he heard Hermes exclaim, “Yes!”

Startled by the sound, Dionysus shot up from bed. Through bleary eyes, he saw Hermes exit the closet carrying a pair of leather sandals with feathery wings. They were surprisingly simple given the mischievous god’s penchant for extravagant things.

“I found them!” he declared, but Dionysus recognized another problem.

“Why are they so small?” he asked.

“They aren’tsmall,” said Hermes, holding up the shoes.

“How big are your feet?”

“I don’t know,” said Hermes.

“How do you—” Dionysus stopped himself. He had asked that question too many times already, and it never got them anywhere. “How am I supposed to wear them if they don’t fit?”

“They’re basically soles with string, Dionysus,” said Hermes. “Put them on.”

Dionysus took one and tried to slip his foot inside, but the most he got was his first three toes.

“Why are your feet so huge?” Hermes asked. Then he met Dionysus’s gaze and raised a brow. “Is it true what they say about shoe size and dick size?”

“I’m not sure what they say,” said Dionysus. “But I’d really rather not talk about my dick with you.”

“Fine,” Hermes said, sniffing. “I was just curious.”

“Well, I need these fucking shoes to fit,” said Dionysus.

“Well, you have magic, idiot.Makethem!”

“They are your gods-damned shoes. I can’t change them!”

“You can add to them! Wrap vines around your fucking feet!” said Hermes. “Gods, and you thinkI’mstupid.”

Dionysus felt his face flush, though he wasn’t sure if it was from embarrassment or frustration.

He sat both shoes on the floor and stepped on the soles. Vines sprouted from them and wound together over his feet and calves.

“There! Now stand.”

Dionysus did and was immediately thrown backward as the sandals flew out from under him. He hit his head on the bed as he went down. Luckily, it was soft, butnow he was hanging upside down, the wings of the sandals strapped to his feet beating furiously.

“What the fuck, Hermes! Tell them to put me upright!”

“I can’t,” said Hermes.