Page 150 of A Touch of Chaos

“Why?”

Hermes shrugged. “Why not?”

Because it’s insane, Dionysus wanted to say but didn’t.

“I never know what my mood will be,” Hermes explained, shuffling over the pink carpet as he made his way into the adjoining pink bathroom. “Some nights, I’m a gold. Some nights, I’m a green.”

Dionysus considered asking what that meant but decided against it. He was short on time, and he needed Hermes’s sandals. The fewer distractions, the better.

Inside the bathroom was a safe door. It was also pink and framed by mirrors that reflected the light overhead. Dionysus imagined it was supposed to look glamorous, but it really just hurt his eyes even more.

Hermes approached the door and glanced back at Dionysus before cupping his hands over the safe’s keypad.

Dionysus rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to steal whatever’s in your closet, Hermes.”

“If you could have stolen my winged sandals, wouldn’t you?”

“To avoid you? Yes,” said Dionysus.

“Rude,” said Hermes as he turned the wheel, pulling open the door to reveal a massive closet with shelves upon shelves of shoes.

“Please tell me you only have one shoe closet,” said Dionysus.

“Okay,” said Hermes.

“Fuck me,” Dionysus groaned.

“Don’t judge me,” said Hermes. “I have an obsession.”

“Don’t you mean addiction?”

“Tomato, potato,” he said.

Dionysus’s brows lowered. “Don’t you mean to-mah-to?”

“No, I mean potato,” Hermes said. “They are two different things entirely.”

Dionysus rolled his eyes again. “Whatever you say.”

Hermes smiled. “I knew you’d see it my way.”

The God of Mischief sauntered into the closet to begin the search. Dionysus followed, eyes scanning Hermes’s many and varied shoes. He picked up a pair of platform heels that were covered in gemstones.

“How do you wear these?” Dionysus asked.

“On your feet,” said Hermes.

Dionysus shook his head. “Real funny,” he said, putting them back on the shelf as Hermes snickered. “You know what I mean.”

“I will admit it takes talent,” he said.

“Don’t you just fly everywhere when you wear them?” said Dionysus.

“That still takes talent,” Hermes said.

“It isn’t a talent,” said Dionysus. “You are a god.”

“We’ll see about that,” said Hermes. They continued to search the closet, but after a while, Hermes declared, “Well, they aren’t here. We’ll have to check the other closets.”

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