“I’ll go with you.”
“Thank you. You want to come with us to get Sasha?” I nod my head when Denz stands and pulls me to my feet. Before we go anywhere, he drags me back into the bathroom to clean up the mess I made on my stomach. He wets a rag and wipes the blood away before passing me my shirt. I slip it back on, and we walk hand in hand out of my room and down to the front door where Harlon is waiting. He walks closer and pulls me into a hug before we all leave together.
The ride to Denz’s mom’s house seems to take forever, and when we get there, it all feels off.
Sitting in the living room while Denz makes phone calls just feels wrong. Sasha is surprisingly calm for someone who just lost her mom.
“Do you need anything?” I ask her.
“I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, I’m good. I got to spend some time with her, and that’s all I wanted.”
“I’m glad you had that time. I know it’s not the same, but when my mom left, it was weird. It was like one minute she was there, and the next she wasn’t. She was pretty absent throughout my life, though, so I suppose that makes it easier,” I tell her.
“We’re kind of the same, aren’t we? My mom wasn’t around much either, preferring the bottle to being a mom. Maybe that’s why I don’t feel as sad as I should.”
“No one can tell you how to feel, Sasha. Only you know what you feel, and whatever that is, it’s okay. We all deal with things in our own way,” I tell her.
“Like you cutting?”
“Yeah. Kind of like that. Not that you should do that, you better not,” I snap at her. Sasha laughs as she lays her head on my shoulder.
“I know, I wouldn’t do that, but thank you for being here,” she tells me. I nod my head, and we sit like this for a long time while Denz is on the phone. Harlon stands out on the front porch alone, and it makes me wonder what he’s thinking. When Sasha says she’s going to pack up her stuff, I walk out on the porch.
“What are you thinking about?” I ask Harlon.
“Life. Everything. How do you go from breathing one minute to dead the next? It’s so crazy. One breath. That’s it, just one breath that doesn’t come, and it’s all over.”
“You miss your mom?”
“No.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.” Instead of pressuring him, I walk over, slide my arms around his waist, and hold onto him. He wraps his arms around me, and that’s how we stay until Denz is ready to go. Sasha packed her stuff into the back of the car and now stands staring at the house she’ll never live in again.
Me and Har walk off the porch and stand next to her.
“You know this isn’t goodbye, right?” Harlon tells her.
“I know. We’ll see her again one day,” Sasha says, and my heart nearly shatters again. “Denz?” she says, turning to her brother.
“Yeah?”
“We never have to come back here, right?” I can only imagine how much pain and hurt they’ve endured in this house.
“No. We’re never coming back,” he tells her. A small smile tugs across her face before she turns and climbs into the car. Harlon moves away from me and climbs in behind her as I walk toward Denz.
“It’s the end of a chapter in your life.”
“But it isn’t the end of the story,” he adds. I smile up at him, not knowing what the hell I’d do without these guys in my life.
“You ready to start a new page?”
“I’m more than ready. This has been a long time coming. It was only a matter of time, right?” I nod my head.