Page 35 of The Devil

“Right, that’s it!” she snaps, banging the table with the palm of her hand, causing me to jump up and look at her like she’s just grown a second head. “We’re going to go and get our hair done, have a massage, buy something sinfully frivolous, and then we’re sorting out that trip of yours to Spain. And I mean booking it and everything, no arguments. We are getting you over the Lucius funk and casting him out for good. Got it?”

She expects me to argue, so when I do answer in the way that I do, she looks like a modern-day Disney princess with their wide, almost creepy-looking eyes.

“Yes!” I reply, banging the table too. “Let’s do it!”

“Well, thank the Lord!” she eventually cries out and we both giggle over our newfound focus for the day, which is definitely not Lucius Hastings.

Meri and I instantly look at one another as soon as we hear a knock on the door. While her eyes are full of glee and excitement, mine are full of deep-rooted anxiety. I must have lost my mind when I decided to ask for pink hair at the salon. Granted, the hairdresser, who was beyond excited to have something off the wall to work with, went for something more of a rose-slash-silvery effect, but still, I lookverydifferent. Meri took a whole five minutes to stop jumping up and down when my blow-dried waves were finally revealed. My little rebellion to everything Lucius also gave me the courage to book a flight to Spain, precisely one week after we break for the summer, which is just a month away.

We spent the afternoon looking for jobs online, after which, we booked a shared room with a girl named Silver, who I chatted with over Messenger for about two hours. She seemed pretty cool, but now I’m worried she’s actually a middle-aged pervert with an unhealthy attraction to pink-haired girls who are still in college. We decided to have my nonna’s money in an easily accessible account should I have to make a swift getaway back to the States, or at the very least, stay in a hotel.

I had felt empowered after achieving so much, but now, Evan is here to take me on a date, and I look more like a hippie than the shy, conservative girl he was with just this morning. I can envision him screaming over the sight of me, then bolting for the stairs, which would be horrifying for all involved. A second knock sounds and I begin breathing in deeply through my nose, then blowing out through my mouth, trying to calm myself down. It’s not working.

“Helena?” his muffled voice calls through the door and I feel as if I want to be sick.

Before I have a chance to shout out, Meri is already opening the door to Evan, who, to my horror, is dressed up in an expensive navy suit and with a huge bunch of roses in hand. I’m glad I dressed up in a black shift dress and a pair of heels, but with my hair, I may as well have put on a pair of ripped jeans and a concert t-shirt from work.

When he takes in his first glimpse of my pink waves, his mouth drops open and his eyes practically bulge out of his head. I immediately wince over the look on his face, especially when he throws the flowers onto my bed and begins walking around, as though trying to take me all in. Meri and I glance at each other with bated breath, but nobody says a word, and it’s about all I can stand.

“Evan, if you don’t want to-”

Before I can finish my sentence, he dramatically pulls me in, swings me down toward the floor, and presses his lips against mine. His eyes are firmly shut, but mine remain wide open in shock. Meri is jumping around in the background again, doing all but clapping her hands and singing. When he pulls me back upright, he gives me one of his charming smiles, the type girls used to gossip about at school.

“I love it,” he whispers, and I think I just about manage to stop my heart from giving out.

“You never told me how Meri’s cousin is?” Evan says as he pours me another glass of wine over dinner. “Is he ok?”

“Oh, that,” I scowl, “he’s fine.” I smile tightly and can’t help thinkingunfortunately, which is an awful thing to say, but I think I’m beginning to hate Lucius Hastings. “Meri, as per usual, was totally overreacting. He had a cut leg and suspected concussion.”

Evan chuckles softly before sipping on his wine with a finesse my parents would be proud of. I can imagine my father being just like him when he was this age, which is a little weird to think about. Though, this is exactly what he wants for me; a man he knows he can trust to look after his only daughter because he’s a younger version of him. Cut out the sexual part of the relationship and I can see his logic. Who doesn’t want what they consider the best for their child? I just sometimes wish he knew how much I can look after myself, and thatIalso know what’s best for me.

“Some girls live on drama,” Evan says, snapping me out of my thoughts at the same time as he takes my hand within his own from across the table. I keep telling myself,‘Come on fireworks, come on tingly feelings, come on butterflies,’ but I get nothing.

“Listen, I’ve got to be honest,” I begin, not giving up on the potential of me and Evan, but also knowing he deserves to hear about my plans for the summer. I also need to tell him that until I get back, I don’t think it’s right to try and define what we are to one another, especially as I’m not overly sure of how I feel about him. It’s only fair to both of us. I sense it’s going to make quite an uncomfortable conversation, but here goes. “I’m going to Spain for the summer. I leave in a month.”

Evan’s expression is unreadable but given that he’s paused with his forkful of steak floating about in the air, I’m guessing he’s a little shocked.

“It’s something I’ve been dreaming about since my nonna died a couple of years ago. I’ve been learning Spanish, slowly, and I want to practice my camera skills somewhere new. And I guess I just want to step outside of my comfort zone, you know?”

He slowly places his fork down onto his plate and takes hold of my hand again. He still doesn’t give much away, so I’m bracing myself for him to be angry, for leading him on or knocking him back. Who knows?

“I think you’re so amazing, Helena. You just keep on surprising me. Sure, I would have liked to have spent some time with you over the summer but I’m also proud of you for following your dreams. You are going to be safe though, aren’t you?”

“Oh, yeah, I’ve got a backup plan and savings behind me, should it all go disastrously wrong. I’ll be fine.” I shrug it off even though I am anxious as hell about it. But a good anxious, an I’m-actually-going-to-do-this anxious. “Of course, my folks don’t know about it yet. I can’t wait for that conversation!”

“Yeah,” he says in a drawn-out fashion, though with a smile on his face. “I don’t envy you that one. Listen, can I be selfish for a moment?” I nod as I twirl my pasta around my fork, if only to keep my fingers busy so I don’t end up chewing nervously on my nails. “What are your thoughts about us? I know what I want, but I’m not sure what you want.”

Oh, God!Taking in a deep breath, I reach for my wine to try and procrastinate while I think of my answer.Just be honest, Helena.

“I really like you, Evan; you’re the first person I’ve dated since the bastard who shall not be named.” I smile at him when I see him stifling his laughter. “But I think I need to do this summer abroad alone before I define anything. I want to keep seeing you, but I totally understand if what I’m offering is not enough. I just don’t think I can agree to anything official right now, it wouldn’t be fair to either of us.”

My heart, what’s left of it, drops when I see the disappointment swimming around in his eyes, but then he brings my hand to his lips and smiles in such a way, it puts me at ease again.

“I’ll take it. Have your summer and then come back to me, ok?”

“Are you sure? I mean, I don’t expect you to stay monogamous or anything. I know guys like you have needs,” I blurt out, then instantly blush when he offers a cheeky grin over our intertwined hands. “God, this is embarrassing. We haven’t even done anything ourselves.”

For God’s sake, Helena, shut up, you goon!

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