Page 62 of Papers Don't Lie

“Depends,” I tease.

Kai watches me lift a shoulder, hiding my smirk behind me, and the tension in his body releases the string it tied around him, building a smile on his lips.

“Is it really going to make you feel better, or are you using that as an excuse?” I continue, raising a brow in challenge at the man who’s my husband.

If until now I haven't considered myself Esmeray Graves, I know our wedding will change how I think. For some reason, a wedding makes our marriage seem ten times more real, and I can’t say I’m against it. After all, we've started being real with each other as well.

“What if I say the kiss is definitely going to make me feel better, but I’m also using it as an excuse?" my husband asks.

Under the covers, my toes curl over each other as I play with the material of my pajamas, trying my hardest not to blush. Firstly, because I can make him feel better, and secondly, he wants to kiss me.

I slowly raise my eyes to meet his, but there’s none of the tenderness he’s shown me since we met. They glisten with nothing but hunger, lust, and impatience. His maxillary locksclosed, sharpening his cheeks into dangerous weapons. I suck in a breath, swallowing the dryness in my throat and waiting for him to make a move so he can take what he wants.

He doesn’t move closer to me. Kai’s stretched out in the same place, one of his hands on Purple’s head as I realize I could wait an entire life, but he won't make a move until he has my consent. Considering how weak my knees are from that thought, I would’ve fallen flat on my face if I were standing on my feet.

“Then I’d say it’s a smart move,” I murmur, my gaze focused on his lips and the way he traces his tongue on the bottom one.

“Esmeray.” He calls me by my name in a grave tone, and I nod, biting my lip. “Are you done messing with me? Put me out of my misery.”

“What misery?" I ask, this time looking at him directly in the eye.

Kai threads a hand through his hair, sighing loudly. “A misery can be a lot of things, Ray. My misery is resisting another minute without kissing you,” he pleads, tilting his head to me.

I don’t try to resist my body’s wish anymore and lean to him, brushing my lips against his soft ones, which open eagerly for me. When it comes to stuff I’m inexperienced at, I’m the clumsiest person on earth. While others are quick learners, I tend to freak out if I stumble upon things that are unfamiliar since in my family, you learn everything you need to know before they send you out in the world. But there wasn’t any course for kissing, and I’m afraid I’m not as good as the other girls he’s kissed.

Without intention, I tense at the images flashing through my mind, taking away the pleasant feeling of his lips against mine. Kai quickly notices and pushes back, a furrow drawing on his forehead.

“What happened?” he asks, the need he felt mere moments ago untraceable. It’s almost as if it wasn’t even there.

Is there any way God can open a big fucking hole in the ground and swallow me so I can escape this moment? How do I even tell him what scenarios my stupid brain just came up with?

My cheeks flush, and I look away, trying to avoid his gaze that only makes me feel like he already knows what I’m about to say.

“Esmeray,” he insists, placing his hand on my shoulder. My eyes move to his palm. “Did I go too far?”

“What?” I interrupt him because he’s saying nonsense. How could he take it too far when he did nothing more than kiss me? His hands never came into the picture, and he didn’t try to push for more either. “I was just thinking about something. You didn’t do anything wrong. I promise.”

He hesitantly nods. “Tell me what it is."

“No.” I shake my head. “It’s nothing.”

Kai’s eyes pin me in place, something unrecognizable flashing in them as I keep my breath inside my lungs. “You can’t tell me it’s nothing when you turned into stone just because I kissed you. If you would’ve told me how you felt, I would’ve never forced you to do anything you don’t want.”

“No!” I jump in, hating his words. “You’re getting this wrong. You are very attractive and quite the gentleman. I could never notfeelfor you,” I admit but don’t have the strength to look at him when I say it.

I hear him breathing out, his head falling onto the headrest of our bed. “Then what it is, Ray? You can tell me.”

My shoulders straighten, and for once in my life, I decide speaking my mind can’t be that bad. If he wants to know, he’ll know.

“I was just thinking how inexperienced I am compared to the other girls you’ve been with.” My head hangs low between my shoulders, and I bite the inside of my cheek, shrugging the thought away. “You’re the first man I ever kissed—I think you can tell—and as much as I want it, I can’t be as good as—”

Kai steals the chance to finish the sentence by snatching the covers from on top of my body, replacing them with his warmth instead. He has me pinned on my back, hands gripped tightly next to my head as his head lowers to me until it reaches my ear.

“You’re my wife. There’s no point in comparing you with some face whose name I can’t remember when you’re my everything.”

My insides purr happily, and my thighs clench together when his crotch brushes by mistake over it. He’s hard for me, and if I want to, he’s ready to enter me as much as I’m ready for him. Kai prompts in his arms to remove himself from me, but I place my fingers around his bicep, watching him in the eyes.

“Kiss me,” I murmur, my gaze dropping to his plumped lips.

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