Page 21 of Between the Pipes

“I bet they were.”

“And yeah, practice Monday through Friday.” I sit up, suddenly. This isSamI’m talking to. “So, crazy thing, I sucked my first dick last night.”

Coughing explodes from the other side of the line. “Sorry, swallowed wrong,” Sam sputters. He takes another gulp of water, his swallow audible over the phone.

“Sorry,” he says again, “did I hear you right?”

“If you heard dick sucking, then yes.”

“Well, shit. How was it?” Sam sounds amused, and I can picture him smiling. I smile back.

“I’m a natural.”

He laughs, loud, and I break out in my own uncontrollable laughter. For a few moments neither of us can breathe.

“Jesus,” he mumbles, voice shaky. “I feel like I need more information. Is it weird if I ask for more information?”

“Didn’t you need something, though?” I say, suddenly remembering the text that started this whole conversation.

“Fuck that, it can wait,” Sam says, flippantly. I flop back down on my pillow, settling in. “I’m sitting out on the back patio, and Troy’s out on a run.”

“Of course, he is.” I clear my throat, place the phone on speaker, and put both hands behind my head. “So, I have a thing going with Nico Mackenzie.”

“A thing,” Sam repeats.

“Yeah, a no-strings-attached thing. His idea.” I try to sound nonchalant, but my tone comes across unhappy anyway.

“How long has this been going on? We just saw you this weekend.”

“Well, we just hooked up last night for the first time. But…I guess it’s been going on since the first day of SCU training camp. I have no explanation for why I even like this guy. He’s the worst. And I liked himbeforehe blew me.”

Sam snorts. “I didn’t understand why I was interested to Troy, either, at the beginning. I don’t think the laws of attraction are always cut and dried.”

“Troy’s the easiest person in the world to love. Nico is…not. He wants to argue about every fucking little thing, and he has these rules about us hooking up, because he’s worried I’m going to get attached.”

The silence on the other end is loud. “Can I ask you a question?” Is what he eventually goes with, speaking carefully as though worried he’s going to offend me.

“Of course.”

“You datea lotof people; or, hook up with a lot of people. It’s never seemed to bother you before, as far as I can tell. What’s so different about this? Is it because he’s a man?”

“No. Yes? I don’t know.” Squinting up at the ceiling, I consider the question. The fact is, itdoesbother me that my relationships all have short shelf-lives. Particularly now, with my closest friends happily coupled and showing me how things could be. “I’m going to be really honest here for a second: I couldn’t tell you exactly why this situation feels different, but I can tell you that I can’t stop thinking about him. Obsession-level thinking about him. It’s extremely inconvenient.”

Sam doesn’t laugh, but I can hear the smile in his voice when he responds. “So, when you say that Mackenzie has rules in place so that you guys don’t get attached…”

“Alright, yeah, so I might already be a little attached. Fuck.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to take whatever he gives me and enjoy it while I can,” I answer, quickly, not even having to think about it. What’s the other option? Breaking things off before they’ve even really begun?

“Sounds like you might be setting yourself up for heartbreak,” Sam warns me, and I sigh.

“Dude, why Nico Mackenzie of all people? Makes no damn sense at all. I’ve never even…I’ve never been attracted to, or thought about another guy like this before.”

“I thought there was something between you and Corwin, when I first started hanging around you guys,” Sam tells me, chuckling softly. In the background, I can hear birds singing.

“Me and Cor?” My nose scrunches up as I make a face. “Ugh, no, why would you think that?”

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