Page 62 of Second First Kiss

“Asking if you’re okay is too much?” He had further to go than he thought in gaining her trust. And it wasn’t going to happen by screwing her every chance he got.

Yes, she thought. Because right then everything felt like too much. The way he was holding her, the way he looked, even the way he gentled his words when he talked to her. As if she were something to be careful with. No one had ever been careful with her. Not even her grandpa who loved her to pieces. It made her heart race in ways that were dangerous.

“You want to see if I’m okay.” She took his hand and ran it down her body to her legs. He moved it at the last minute to cup her thigh.

“I’m being serious.”

And she wasn’t? She was the one keeping the level head, keeping that wall up so that no one got hurt and there weren’t any mixed feelings.

“Are you calling me shallow?” she asked.

“I’m calling you confusing.”

“What’s confusing?” She permitted herself a withering stare because it was better than exposing just how much that comment affected her. “We both had an itch to scratch.”

Curses fell from his mouth. “Is that all you think this is?”

“I think it’s called animal magnetism.” Feeling too exposed, she pulled a towel off the rack and stood, wrapping herself up. “I gotta go.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“How did you mean it?” Because to her, being called confusing while sitting naked on the floor after a little wall-banging wasn’t a compliment.

“It’s just that you take things head on, but whatever just happened between us you’re dodging. Pretending that it was just chemistry.”

But it was just chemistry. Right? He wanted her, she wanted him, they had a chance encounter when they both needed to blow off some steam. Nothing more.

“I can see where your brain is going.” He stood and took her hand in his masculine one. “Don’t let it.”

“I can’t help how my brain works,” she argued. “This is who I am. Take it or leave it.”

The moment those words left her mouth she wanted to take them back. Force them down into the hollow pit in her stomach where reality lived. Because she’d just implied that she was open to more. That it was his call.

Shit, she’d just put the ball in his court, and she felt like, when it came to him, she didn’t have a racket.

“Forget I said that.”

“I can’t,” he teased. He wrapped her in his arms. “Stay. Don’t leave mad.”

Mad was a hell of a lot safer than what she was feeling right then. “This carriage is about to turn into a pumpkin.”

“I like pumpkin.”

“Tessa might wake up and then what kind of example would I be setting?”

“Hey, you’re doing more than most people would.”

She swallowed hard and cursed the stinging behind her eyes. “According to her principal, I need to do better.”

And she did. She needed to stop acting without thinking and remember what was important. Making a safe and stable home for Tessa.

“Tonight was all I had to give, Nolan. I don’t have any more.”

More wasn’t something she was remotely interested in courting. She knew what men saw. From the outside she came off as a mysterious ballbuster, a challenge. But behind closed doors, her life was nothing but a challenge. And in the end that was always the kiss of death with men. If he thought she was complicated now, just wait until he realized just how big of a mess her life was. The kind of mess that no man in his right mind would want to put up with on a daily basis. And that’s what this would eventually become—Nolan putting up with her schedule, her sister, the money problems, juggling two jobs, the drama…all the things.

Her best friend was going to be his sister-in-law and now she had a job on the line. Not that Nolan would ever fire her over something personal, but how awkward would it be for him if things progressed and then crashed. Because they would crash. Like two bullet trains whose brakes had been cut.

“Things between us are already too intertwined. Between Jax and Milly and this new job, I don’t want to make a mistake and ruin things for everyone.”