Page 404 of S is for SEX

ERIK. In the past, the females who I had spent time with were women that I could initially see myself with for a matter of months at best. Often, they would last a few weeks to a month. Generally, it was several weeks or months before I would ever commit mentally or physically to have sex with someone. They had to convince me, through their expressed thoughts and their actions that they were capable of being in a relationship with me that was not emotional, and be capable of having sex. The thought of having someone fall in love, and then, when the relationship ended, having them mentally, physically, or spiritually hurt by the relationship ending was not something that I wanted to have to wonder about.

It was a strange balancing act for both parties. I knew enough about myself to know that when I felt as if someone was different, and that I was developing some form of feeling of necessity for them, I would force myself to let them go. This had not happened with any degree of frequency, possibly two or three times in my adult life, but it had happened.

Knowing that any day you may be dismissed from a relationship was not a comforting feeling to most women. Some women, when I explained to them my requirements for a relationship, would just tell me that I was insane, and end it before it ever started. Most swore they were capable, and after a few months, would admit that they had fallen in love and that they couldn’t imagine a moment without me. Always, when I learned that this type of feeling existed, I would have to end the relationship.

Typically, after one of these types of endings, it may be a year before I would commit to try again. Each time, the woman that I chose to be with would be the same age as the last, if not younger. I continued to grow older, while my sexual partners grew younger. The age gap continued to be more of a gap as time passed.

Regarding my sexual advances, I had begun to be more aggressive with Kelli than most women. Typically, I would not ask the questions that I had asked until a few weeks had passed. I would not have done what I did in the Italian restaurant until we had seen each other for a matter of weeks, or possibly even a month. I wanted her to either fail, or to succeed, but with her, I wanted the answer immediately. For some reason, this girl was different to me. I felt that the sex with her could be emotionally charged without the actual emotion.

As the sun was starting to set, I drove east toward the theatre. As Kelli sat quietly, I turned the music up a little louder with the steering wheel mounted controls. The Black Keys, Sinister Kid played over the stereo. As I was beginning to enjoy the music and thinking of what it would take to break Kelli, she spoke.

“I like this music, who is it?”

“The Black Keys,” I responded.

She nodded and went back to being quiet. Tapping her fingers on her knee, she gazed at the road ahead as if she had no care in the world where we ended up. She was as attractive of a woman as I had ever seen, and her personality was a definite ten out of ten, so far. At some point I would reveal a flaw or series of flaws, but so far she was full of pleasant surprises. As I turned into the entrance of the theatre, she spoke again.

“Uhhm, we’re going to the movies? Really? Is this a joke?”

“No, Kelli, it isn’t a joke. I thought it would give us time and the ability to relax before we go to some of the clubs in Old Town. Is it going to become a problem?” I responded softly, but sternly.

“No sir. It is not a problem, I am sorry,” she said quietly and apologetically.

I parked the car at the rear of the lot and got out to walk around to her side of the car. As I was walking to her side of the car, she began to open the door. I finished opening it for her and stood at the rear of the car, waiting. She got out of the car and started slowly walking toward the theatre. I turned to face the theatre, placed my hand on my belt, extended my elbow to the side, and spoke in a sharp tone.

“Kelli, who are you going in the theatre with?”

As soon as she heard the tone of my voice, she stopped walking. She turned and looked back at me, maybe five or six steps beyond me. As soon as she made eyes contact with me, she ran toward me and responded as she ran.

“You, Erik.”

“Act like it, Kelli. Act like it. On my left, each time, understand?”

“Yes sir,” she said as she extended her arm through mine.

As we walked toward the theatre, she inched closer and closer to me, brushing against me each time we walked between the cars in the lot.

“Why did you park so far away from the door?” she turned and asked.

“Well, Kelli, I take care of my things. Be it a car, my motorcycle, my mind, my body, or you. Things that are important to me, I take precautions to preserve them. I parked far away so no one will park beside me and open their door into my car, denting it. When I get rid of that car in a year or so, it will look like it did the day I bought it.”

“I see, that’s good to know,” she said in a supportive tone.

We walked up the steps into the theatre, and I opened the door for her. Her hair looked almost blue in the fluorescent lighting from the parking lot. Long, black, and straight, I smelled her hair products as she entered the building. Passing through the entrance, I smiled as she gripped my arm tightly. We walked to the ticket counter and chose an open line.

“Two for White House Down,” I said to the young man at the counter.

“Twenty one dollars,” he responded.

After handing him the money, we turned to walk toward the concession and restroom area.

“Do you want anything?” I asked, motioning to the counter.

“No thank you,” she said as she shook her head and smiled.

We walked to the counter, arm in arm, and I ordered two bottles of water and paid the concession clerk. I handed her a bottle of water, and we walked toward the front of the theatre.

“White House Down, theatre number nineteen, second on the left,” the kid said as he tore the tickets in two, handing me half of the tickets back. I started folding the movie tickets in my hands as we walked the second theatre on the left.

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