Page 114 of Eves (Carson Brothers)

I tried to put the guilt aside. It wasn't hard to think about something else, especially with my next scan approaching.

It had passed so quickly, and although my baby quickly started to move every other second of the day, I was still worried that something could be wrong. The amount of stress I'd inflicted onto my body during my pregnancy so far wasn't healthy and it made me feel sick with guilt. I stood in the centre of my old bedroom, now a blank canvas and I shed a small tear, feeling as if everything had been wiped away, never to be remembered again. Don't get me wrong, the amount of sadness I'd felt in this room was immeasurable at times, but it was all linked to the family that I had lost. Without it, it was as if they'd never existed at all.

I knew I was being overly dramatic and my hormones didn't help, I still couldn't help it.

After the fire, I'd been given a box full of stuff that had been saved. The box wasn't very big and I had to re-buy any clothes that I'd left here. Thankfully, the few weeks prior to the fire, more and more of my things had been moved to Kit's house because I was practically living with him there. The same couldn't be said for my grandparents. They had only the belongings that they had taken on holiday with them. Thankfully the necessities had been taken with them in their suitcases.

"Part of me sees this as our fresh start," my grandma said from the kitchen as I came back downstairs. I had to smile because she always saw the positive in everything. Apart from things not anyone could see the positive from…

I remembered the day I'd walked down the stairs over a year ago, like a skeleton after not eating for weeks. My grandma had been sitting on the kitchen floor, sobbing and begging God to bring our family back.

The memory brought a cloud of sadness over my body, remembering how badly it had been raining that day. As if even the weather could feel the pain.

My grandad placed his arm around her and admired their new home. I allowed the darkness in my head to fade away as I saw how happy they were with the new decor.

"We did say that everything needed redecorating," he said.

"You could almost call it opportune, apart from the fact that all of our possessions have turned to ash."

I stood by the kitchen doorway, smiling at them.

They were making the best of it with their jokes and it made me not worry so much about them. They were the strongest people I'd ever met. Together, they only became stronger.

"We got a call earlier today," my grandad said and I nodded.

"The investigation has unfortunately been dropped. There just wasn't enough evidence."

I felt guilty, already knowing everything they were telling me.

Kit had already told me a month ago that they were dealing with it at Delta, that it had to be left to run its course because dropping it so early with the police wouldn't do any good. Then a few days earlier Kit had told me that they were going to have the case dropped, so that it couldn't bother my grandparents for any longer. So that they could move forward while Delta carried on with the case. The case being, where the hell had Maddie gone, and why had she attempted murder of all people, Kit.

It wasour first night alone since my grandparents had moved in.

Completely alone.

The scan was in a couple of days, and that night when I'd come home alone, I thanked Bob for the lift and rushed inside quickly. He'd picked me up from the corner of my grandparents street so they didn't see him, and I realised then, as I sat down in his car, that I needed to tell them. I couldn't put it into words, I justhadto tell them. I couldn't continue seeing them and lying to them.

Kit had returned from Delta about an hour after and had headed straight out to take his jog down the Beck. Now, for some reason I was absolutely mafting. I couldn't cool myself down.

I blamed my hormones because they were to blame for everything these days. I sat feeling sorry for myself with an ice-lolly, dressed in just my knickers and one of Kit's sleeveless tops that I'd found lying around the bedroom.

I stayed that way, relaxing on the sofa and watching TV when Kit returned from his shower.

"Eves, you—"

"Hi," I stared at him, standing in his boxers and still looking damp from his shower.

"You need something?" I asked as he stared at me.

"I was gonna ask if you've seen… Nevermind," he came towards me.

"What?" I asked as he continued to stare at me.

"Nothing," he eventually said smiling down at me, "you eaten yet?"

"No, I was waiting for you. I'm eatingthisbecause I can't cool down."

It felt so good to sit like this without worrying about my grandparents being here. Still, strangely enough I missed them and sent my grandma a quick text to make sure they were settled in okay.

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