Page 265 of Unravelling The Beast

“Everything is going to be okay, Cree; I promise.”

After some time together, I spot Sara in the doorway with a glass of orange juice. Her eyes soften as she evaluates us, and she smiles briefly before entering the room and placing the drink on the bedside table.

“Cree, sweetie, your breakfast is ready at the dining room table.”

As he sits up, he glances down at me before kissing my cheek softly, and I close my eyes. When he withdraws, I open my eyes to see him leap out of bed and leave the room. Sara takes a seat on the bed and speaks gently while I cautiously sit up and lay my back against the headboard.

“How are you feeling today?”

I sigh, looking away, before I respond coldly.

“The same as every day.”

I notice from the corner of my eye that she gives a small nod.

“I'm going to take Cree to my mom's, and then we'll go to your scan together.”

I look at her now.

“You don't have to do that, Sara.”

She gives me a small smile before reaching over and taking my hand in hers.

“I want to be there for you, Wren. It's what Arlo would have wanted.”

I can sense the sadness in her eyes when I gaze into them, but she knows how to put on a brave face for me. I'm sure she's feeling lost without her little brother, and it's killing her too because they were so close.

I glance away again before I well up and respond quietly.

“Okay, thank you.”

She gives my hand a squeeze before standing.

“Get yourself ready, and I'll be back soon.”

I give her a small nod and watch her walk out of the room.

When she closes the door behind her, I groan and throw the sheets back, feeling absolutely deflated because I don't have the energy to do this today, but I know I need this scan.

This will be the first time I've left the house since that night; I've spent the majority of the time in bed unless I'm with Cree. I can't face the world right now; I'm getting colder by the day. The darkness is engulfing me, extinguishing my light with each passing day.

I came to stay here with Cree because he needs as many people around him as he can get right now, and to be honest, I do too, even if I don't want to completely engage with them. Being around his family gives me a sense of comfort I can't explain.

It makes me feel close to him even though I know I'll never be close to him in my dreams, which are now nightmares. My mom is begging me to return home after believing Arlo simply died in a house fire, but I can't and I won't.

I want to stay here until I'm strong enough to stand on my own. I get out of bed and walk to the ensuite bathroom, lifting my nightdress up my body as I do. When I enter, I reach inside and turn the shower on before removing the rest of my clothing.

I catch a glimpse of myself in the large mirror, which causes me to stop to observe myself while I stand to the side and notice a rising bump. It's only small, and someone who wouldn't know I was pregnant would definitely mistake it for gas, but I can still see it growing.

I close my eyes and rub my hand along the tiny bump, always feeling grateful that even if he isn't here with me anymore, I will always be privileged to have a part of him growing inside of me.

I gently open my eyes and stare at myself in the mirror again. My eyes are still puffy from crying every day, and there's a tinge of gray under my eyes from not getting enough sleep. My skin, which Arlo would call sun-kissed, has turned pallid and dry; I no longer recognize myself.

I pull my gaze away from myself before stepping under the warm water, and as soon as it touches my skin, I toss my head back and let it flow down my face and hair.

Placing my hands on the wall in front of me, I drop my head forward, my eyes closed, hoping that the water will wash away the sorrow that has settled inside my suffering soul and restore my humanity.

My engagement ring glistens in the light as I cautiously lift my head and open my eyes, catching my attention. I stand up straight before staring down at it for a few moments, submerged in my own thoughts, before flipping my hand around and gazing at my palm.