Page 94 of 12 Days

Chapter 38

Alyssa

I'm scared to approach the guys.

Who wouldn't be?

Me versus 12 alpha males, you do the math.

I know where my heart lies though, and there's nothing I can do about it. I prepare myself to go into the building, their headquarters.

I straighten out my tight pencil skirt and make sure that just a hint of lingerie is showing. A little leg couldn't hurt in this situation. I’m gonna need all the leverage I could get.

I smooth my hair down, check my lipstick in the reflection of the building door, and breathe in some courage.

I have to do this. I have to make my intentions known. No more betrayal, no more lies. I'm ready for a clean slate and to be transparent. I only hope it's not too late.

I walk through the familiar building and am again astounded at the richness and modernity of it. I'm so lucky to have had these guys in my life for as long as I have. Hopefully, today I can still have them.

My disloyalty has shone through, and I know that they might not truly trust me again, but I have to try. I want them to know that I value every second we spent together and that I don't want to lose them for anything.

I ride the elevator up to where the secretary said they are. They're in the conference room, likely scrambling to fix what they think I've done.

I walk down the hall as I feel my heart beating out of my chest. I don't think I've ever been this nervous my entire life.

I want each of these men and somehow, I have just the thing to prove that I'm the one for them. If I lose even one of them, my life will be over. That's how I feel at this point.

I stand just outside the door and peek in the window. I see only the guys in there and they're surrounded by piles of paperwork and they're all kind of shouting and they seem pretty pissed off. It's like a lion's den and I'm just about to walk into it.

At the same time, I can’t help but admire the view. My 12 guys are so fucking hot, and I'll never get over that. I wish I was walking into something great, to a happy meeting, where maybe it would end with them taking me across the conference table.

Instead, I have to march in there, admit my wrongs and beg for their forgiveness. I breathe in deep and hope it goes okay.

With all the courage I can muster, I turn the door handle and walk in on the meeting.

Everybody stops what they're doing. All eyes turn to me.

"Alyssa," Ethan says. "You're here."

I'm hesitant to walk in. What if they bite my head off? I decide to start by holding nothing back.

"I...I came to give you this back," I hand Ethan the formula.

Ty says, "You're giving us the real formula back? Why?"

"Yeah," Simon chimes in. "I thought you were out to destroy us? What changed?"

I stand sadly before them. I can't take their expressions of despair and betrayal. Hot tears start to stream down my cheeks as I realize what I've done to hurt these guys.

I must look a pitiful sight site because Ethan takes mercy on me and offers me his chair.

"Oh, you guys, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for everything," I'm crying now and it's revealing and embarrassing, but they have to know the truth.

This may be my last chance with them. If I don't lay it on the table now, I may never get a chance to do so in the future.

I start out by saying, "I told the FDA that this entire investigation came up with nothing. I told them there's no secret to it, and that I tested it in my personal lab. I gave my boss the results showing it's just a regular perfume. I had to come and tell you guys in person."

Tears rush down my cheeks.