Page 73 of Unfinished

“No. No—you don’t get to speak now,” she yelled as she held her hands up to ward him off from coming any closer. “I can’t do this now. I need some time. I’m going to your room, and you’re going to leave me alone. Go take care of Veesha. I’ll let you know when I’m ready to see your face again.”

She walked unsteadily backwards, arms still up for several steps until she was certain he wouldn’t follow. Then for the second time that morning, she ran like her life depended upon it. She outran the wind, until the grass and the spent cornstalks blurred behind her tears. She ran even though everything she saw reminded her of him, reminded her of them. She ran and hoped she’d be able to forget.

* * *

She fled from him.He’d felt it all go wrong the moment he’d looked into her eyes and saw her gaze go hollow and distant. All of his relief, all of his joy at her and Veesha’s safety leached out of him, dissipating like ether in the wind. He stood there, unable to move as he watched her run. The courtyard door stood open, the entrance swallowing up her small figure as he tried to force himself to follow, but she’d told him she didn’t want him, that she couldn’t bear to look at him.

R’kash slid to his knees and held his head as he prayed. It was Sienna’s Christmas, and he had to hope that by the end of it she’d give him one more gift—forgiveness.

29

Sienna was tired,grumpy, hungry and hurt. She peeked at the window through slitted eyes, theslithenfur wrapped up in a ball that she hugged to her chest as she lay in R’kash’s bed. At least a few hours must’ve passed, but she didn’t feel any better than she had when she’d first lain down.

R’kash hadn’t come after her. He’d left her alone like she’d asked. That was good, right?

She sighed and rolled the little round device in her hand. She’d considered using it at least five times since he’d told her the truth, and each time she’d stopped herself, although she couldn’t bring herself to put it down. The small ball was no bigger than a stone she might’ve picked up off the ground, but the emergency beacon would have someone from the Mate Portal Program here in no time.

One little press and she could be on her way back to Verkissat, and then home to Earth. The thought left her numb. She couldn’t muster up any excitement or joy. The truth was that she didn’t want to leave, even if she felt like she should. She didn’t want to ruin Veesha’s first Christmas, even if it meant far less to the little girl than it did to Sienna.

She couldn’t even really remember exactly what he’d said to her, except that he hadn’t been the one to choose her or write the messages. What else was there to say? He’d kept up the charade and acted like she mattered to him until she was in too deep, and now he wanted to pretend he loved her because it was convenient?

Sienna sat up, and her fist tightened hard enough around the beacon that it hurt. She couldn’t hide away in his room all day.Hisroom. This wasn’t even her space. She glanced around and couldn’t make herself believe that. There was the wardrobe with her clothing and the chocolate dispenser he’d had installed on a new table against the wall so he could bring her a bowl first thing every morning. She pushed her nose into theslithenfur. Even his bedding smelled like her, although currently she was a little ripe, she realized with a grimace. All that sprinting and the adrenaline-dump during Veesha’s rescue had done a number on her.

She needed to go back to the basics, and then she’d consider making a decision. She went to the bathing chamber and washed and dried herself. Then she put on a fresh outfit, just jeans and a shirt—she wasn’t dressing up in the gown he’d given her like she’d originally planned for Christmas dinner. Not now.

Next on the agenda was some food. She hadn’t eaten anything since their impromptu cookie party the night before, and that’d been mostly alcohol and processed sugar, so she knew she needed to get something more substantial in her stomach. Sienna slid the beacon into her pocket and closed her hand around the sparkling green pendant at her throat. She could take it off. She could throw it back at him.

She dropped her hand and headed for the door.

Later when she approached the kitchen, she heard voices, but they grew quiet as soon as she stepped through the doorway. H’viss and Jesthi stood by the counter, and Veesha was sitting in front of the Christmas tree playing with some of their burnt salt dough cookies.

“Sienna, are you well?” asked H’viss.

She just looked at him for a long moment. Then she switched her focus to Jesthi. Oh, God. They’d read every message. They knew exactly how she felt about R’kash, how eager she’d been to meet him. They knew each and every detail.

“Did he tell you that he told me the truth?” From their faces alone, she knew he had. “Then how do you think I feel?”

Sienna walked over to one of the stasis cabinets and searched through the bins for something appetizing. She shoved them all back into place and shut the door.

“Let me help explain,” started H’viss.

“No.” She turned around to face them again, and noticed that Veesha had put down her cookies and had her pert little face tilted as she listened in. “Not now, and especially not here,” she said as she glanced meaningfully at Veesha. “Can you tell me where he is?” She wasn’t going to be able to eat. She wasn’t going to be able to do anything until she talked to him again, as much as she was dreading it.

Jesthi released a held breath, a tremulous smile making his lips turn up as he fidgeted with his fingers. “He’s on the rooftop, lady. I can take you there if—”

“No,” she interrupted. “That won’t be necessary.” She walked over to Veesha and put on a smile she hoped didn’t look as fake as it felt and crouched down to give her a hug. “Are you having fun? Is that theslithen?” she asked as she let go of the girl and pointed to the cookie shaped like a cat’s head with what looked like horns.

Veesha’s feathers flicked up, and then she slowly smiled. “Yes. It’s scaring thev’kelth,” she explained, and she made theslithencookie attack one of Sienna’s evergreen-shaped trees.

So that was what that roaring sound had been—aslithencry—and the alarms used it to frighten off the giant animals.

“There really was aslithenout there today,” remarked Jesthi. “The scanners caught it following the herd, although it was also disoriented by the alarms. It’s probably what caused the stampede in the first place.”

“Are they dangerous?” she asked, still holding on to Veesha with one arm.

“Not usually unless cornered. They’re more interested in thev’kelthand other animals like them than us.”

She didn’t look up at Jesthi, but she gave Veesha another quick hug. “I’ll see you later, okay? I promise,” she added when Veesha didn’t want to let go.