Page 41 of The Sound Of Silence

“We’re fine, Willow. Are you okay?” Pippa asks while Jesse stays silent, paying attention to my every word. There’s a weird tension between them again, but I ignore it. Now’s not the time to worry about that too.

“Never better,” I lie, before smiling as I walk into my room, their hushed whispers following me as I go.

I barely eat the dinner I bought. Instead I push it around the box until I can’t look at it any longer. I’m completely drained from my conversation with Bea, but after all these years, I shouldn’t be letting it get to me. I lost my best friend, and I can’t remember what happened. But I’ve mourned her. I need to separate the two Jades in my mind or I’ll never move on.

After settling into bed, I somehow drift off but startle awake sometime later with tears in my eyes and no memory of my dream.

Sitting up, I take a few sips of water before attempting to sleep again. But of course it doesn’t happen, and I stare at the ceiling for a good hour before deciding to do something about it.

Jumping out of bed, I throw on a pair of sweats and a light hoodie before grabbing my picnic blanket.

The fresh air often helped when I was young, and I’m hoping that hasn’t changed. Granted, I usually had Mom or Dad to keep me company. But I’m the adult now. I’ll be fine.

I tiptoe to the front door, conscious of a sleeping Jesse a few feet away. But as it turns out, I could have stomped my way here, because just as I reach for the door handle, he speaks, startling me instead. “What are you doing?”

“Jesus. I’m just getting some air,” I say without looking his way. I do not need to see a just-woken, mussed-hair version of Jesse.

“It’s the middle of the night, Willow. Open a fucking window.”

God, that tone. Why does it make my insides melt?

“It’s not the same,” I say, now looking his way but avoiding eye contact. “And I’m just going to the front steps. Go back to sleep and you’ll never even notice I’m out there.” Like I’m planning to pretend you’re not in here.

Jesse doesn’t say anything else so I head out the door, relishing in the crisp night air as it hits my face. After laying the picnic blanket out on the second step, I sit down just as the door swings open again.

With his eyes squeezed shut, Jesse steps out into the elements, and from the grimace on his face, I’m going to say he doesn’t really want to be here. I don’t blame him. It’s much cooler than I thought it would be, and he’s not dressed for it. No, he’s wearing freaking gray sweats and a short-sleeved tee.One that rides up, giving me a glimpse of his skin as he runs his hand through his messy hair.

“What are you doing? Where are your clothes?” I ask, biting back my feelings.

“I’m getting some air,” he repeats my earlier response. “And it’s summer—how was I to know it would be cold?”

“It’s not cold, it’s fresh,” I say, holding back an eye roll. “And why do you need air?”

Jesse moves down to my step, forcing me to shuffle over so he can sit beside me. “I couldn’t sleep,” he says with a shrug. “Same as you, I’m guessing.”

Yep.

“Why can’t you sleep? Are you up worried about your fight with Pippa?” I cringe as the words leave my mouth, but like always he ignores me.

“Why can’tyousleep?” he counters, without giving me an answer.

“I was worrying about your fight with Pippa.” I deadpan, digging myself an even bigger hole.

Jesse’s eyes widen before morphing into a scowl so quickly he could give a girl whiplash. “Really?” he asks with a dash of attitude.

“No, not really. I can’t back that up.” I try to hold back a smile at my joke, but struggle, because, come on, it was a little bit funny. Not that I expect him to get it.

Jesse stares at me for a beat until recognition crosses his face. “Did you just quote Austin Powers?”

“I did,” I say with a huge grin as he rolls his eyes trying to hide the slight curl of his lips.

“Do you ever think about what it would be like to watch those movies again, now,” I say, moving the subject away from his relationship with Pippa. “Humor has changed so much. I wonder if people seeing them for the first time today would still enjoy them.”

“Wow. I often wonder the same thing,” Jesse says, his eyes on the road in front of us while mine flash to his face.

“Really?”That surprises me.

He turns to me with a deadly serious expression before shaking his head. “No, not really. I can’t back that up.”

---