Page 11 of Lavender Moon

Satisfied with the perfectly imperfect image saved on my phone, I tuck it away and accept the root beer he holds out to me.

The sun is just beginning its descent as we get comfortable, drinks in hands and movie cued up. We spend the next hour and a half scaring the shit out of ourselves and each other, and when the credits roll, I go over to the pit to fire up the logs and newspaper Kaleb had already prepped. He meets me back on the mattress, holding out another root beer for me and a real beer of his own before reclining back with an arm tucked behind his head. The inside of his bicep is on display, lines of muscles and tattoos being picked up by licks of firelight. It’s flicking on all sorts of switches on my insides, and I pretend not to gawk as I curl up on a pillow a couple feet away. I’ve seen him grow up in such gradual phases, and last year, I saw a change in him for sure, but this year it’s impossible to see him as a boy. He may only be eighteen, but he’s definitely a man when I look at him. Pair that with the close connection over the years, and God, is it doing things to me.

“How long are we staying out here?” I ask conversationally as I look out at the reflection of the moon, crinkling on the surface of the water.

“All night if we want.”

All night together… on a bed.

My mind nervously flits to a vision of Kaleb and I curled in close together under a blanket, trying to keep warm as I breathe in that scent that makes me want to grow up right along with him. To be a woman to his man. He snaps me out of it by hauling himself off the mattress. After placing his empty bottle in the trash bin, he reaches behind him to pull off his shirt.

“Uh… what are you doing?” I ask, cocking my head to the side.

“Let’s jump in the lake,” he suggests, tilting his head in the direction of the water.

“Um, no thanks, I’m good.” I turn my head away, busying myself with a drink from my bottle. I don’t know why his disrobing is giving me flutters all of a sudden when I saw him without a shirt for half the summer when we had to do swim activities with the campers. Maybe it’s because it’s just him and me in a semi-romantic atmosphere.

“Come on,” he beckons, dragging the second word out as he looks down to unbutton his shorts.

“Oh my God,” I look away again, holding a hand up by my face as a blinder.

“Pffft… please. You’ve seen me in my swim trunks, don’t tell me my boxer briefs are too revealing for you.”

“Just… trying to protect your modesty.” I give my tone a joking lilt as I hesitantly drop my hand. Since he’s cool with me seeing him in his underwear, I let myself look while trying not to make it obvious, or openly gawk. “Nice skivvies,” I tell him, arching a brow as I mentally catalog the form-fitting cotton material hugging his hips and thighs.

“Yeah, whatever.” He brushes off my teasing as he kicks his shorts to the side. “Come in with me,” he implores again in a steady voice.

“Nope.”

“Chickenshit,” he sniggers, lifting a challenging eyebrow at me.

“Fuck you,” I huff back, still nervously chuckling. And your biceps.

“What are you so afraid of? Getting your hair wet?” he jeers as he starts backing slowly in the direction of the dock.

“No…” I shoot back, annoyed.

“Getting caught?”

“No.”

“Having a dare blemish your dare-free record?” he teases, his tongue poking out at me from between his teeth.

“You’re not daring me, so I’m all set,” I inform him smugly as I stand and slowly start following his leisurely backwards pace.

This makes him stop and level me with a hard look. “Lu, seriously… When are we going to see each other again after this? Don’t you want to remember this as the night you did something unexpected?”

Ooh. Playing Jedi-mind tricks, are we?

For a quick second I humor him, and try to mentally fast forward to myself years in the future looking back at this night, and telling myself I just hung out on the bank; that I couldn’t even be talked into a simple night swim.

“You coming?” he prods further, and I barely have a second to register the look on his face as he shifts from the firelight and is promptly backlit by the moonlight that kicks off the water. His eyes have gone half-lidded with a lazy smile that does something to my insides, lighting up my senses with endorphins.

I close my eyes and let out a nervous sigh that quakes my body. “Fine,” I concede, dropping my head back.

“Yes!” Kaleb celebrates, clapping his hands a couple times in triumph. I feel a tug at the corner of my mouth and a flutter in my abdomen at his excitement. In fact, I feel a quite a few new sensations at the idea of him wanting me to come in the water with him. Even so, I avert my eyes as I kick off my sneakers and undo the clasp on my jeans.

I can feel his gaze on me without looking as I work the denim down my hips, trying not to feel self-conscious or nervous for him to see me half-dressed. I try reassuring myself that it’s dark out here anyway, and he probably can’t see much. We’re too far from the fire for him to take note of my purple bikini underwear, yet I still find myself tugging at the hem of my t-shirt that refuses to come down to even my pelvis.

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