Page 41 of Travis

“No, really, I’m fine.” She waves. And I don’t know whether she’s sloughing it off or if there’s something else going on, that I’m not privy to anymore, seeing as we’re not together.

“Becky, I’m not seeing her.” I urge. “I’m not seeing anyone, darlin’. I want you to know that.”

She swallows harshly, closing her eyes, as if the mere subject is painful. “Travis, it’s okay. It’s…not my business.”

“But I told you, I—”

She cuts me off, lifting a hand. “I know. And I believe you, Travis. I just said that it’s not my business.”

“But it is your business.” I argue. “I…” I want to say it so badly. I love every bone in her body. Every hair on her head. I’ve never stopped loving her and I never will. But if I say it, she’ll clam up, and walk away, and I want to keep her here for as long as I can.

“Travis, I have to go.” She says, gesturing to Greg, who is staring her down, like a fucking dog. I want to go over there and wring his fucking pencil neck, but I know that Becky will kill me if I do.

“Sure. Okay. I’ll see you later.” I want to kiss her so bad. I can’t help it. My eyes go to her lips. For a split second, hers go to mine, and I hang on to that look, burning it into my memory, since it’s been so long since I’ve seen it. She still loves me. I know she does. She misses it, too. She misses those little nuances that we had when we were together. I can feel it. Fuck it. I’m kissing her. I lean in and kiss her forehead tenderly. “You take care.”

She doesn’t say anything, but her eyes tell the tale. Something is going on inside those eyes of hers. I know it. My gut keeps saying so and I’m listening. As I watch her walk to that fuckhead of an assistant, I feel a shiver up my spine. He may not have a criminal record, he may not have a known face around town, and he may look good on paper, but so help me God, there is something sinister about that asshole. He’s got that look in his eyes. I’ve seen it before so many fucking times I can recognize it in seconds.

Kurt walks up to me. “She okay, man?”

I nod, looking at the ground. “Yeah. She’s okay. I can’t say the same about that fuck for brains she’s hired though. I don’t like him. Not one damn bit.”

“I can tell, man. And I think he knows it, too, so you better lay off, before Becky catches on.”

“Kurt, so help me God, if he’s got anything up his sleeve, I’ll fucking kill him.”

“I know you will.” He rubs his hand across his chin, as if in thought. “Maybe it’s time for you to have a little conversation with our friend.”

“Maybe so.” I say, watching him get into his car and pull out, into the street. “But anything I say to him is going to get back to Becky. And that’s the last thing that I need.”

“Well, it doesn’t have to be you, man.”

I look at him. “What, do you want to do it for me? He’ll think I’m a fucking pussy, man, having someone else do my bidding for me.”

“What’s more important, man?”

I consider this for a moment. “Nah, he’ll know that I’m behind it, anyway. It’ll still get back to her.”

“Up to you, Travis. But I think that if he’s up to something, it’s a small price to pay, having Becky mad at you. If anyone came after my Lisa, I’d sooner have her mad at me and safe, then up shit’s creek, but cool with me.”

Taking a moment to absorb his point, I bite my lip. “If that’s what’s going down, man, I’ll do it. I’d like nothing more than to tell that fucker what I think of him, and what I’ll do to him if he does anything to fuck my wife over.” I pause, thinking that if Becky were here, she’d correct me. “And she’s not my fucking ex-wife, either, man. I fucking hate saying that word.”

“I get it, man. It doesn’t offend me at all.”

Grayson comes over, holding little Grant in his arms. “Hey, man, where have you been hiding?” Kurt asks his brother.

“I was taking a nap with the tyke.” He smiles. Grant is snuggling into his daddy. I rub his cheek with the back of my hand. “You wanna go see Travis?” Grayson asks his son.

Grant is such a cool kid. He’ll follow me around like a lost puppy, while I work, and he’s not afraid to pitch in and help. Quite the cuddler with me, too, he wraps his chubby little arms around my neck. In the corner of my eye, I can see Becky watching me from her car. Our eyes lock, and I watch her face fall, and that warm look in her eyes is replaced with that forlorn, deflated one that I’ve been seeing for longer than I want to admit. As Grant plays with my hair, I realize that Becky is still hurting so bad over not being able to have kids. It's so palpable it hurts me, too.

…and then I understand why she had me leave, and it scares the living shit right out of me.

Hanna

The engagement photos went well. Laura’s made such a fuss over making everything perfect, and teamed with both Becky and Greg, Chris got some magnificent pictures of us from all over the ranch. We were lucky to get Chris, I’m told, and I can see why. He sends us over the digital images, promising to get those developed that we want to later, and both Liam and I pore over them, thankful that we’re going to see this thing through to the end.

“God, they’re beautiful.” I breathe, in awe.

“Just think how breathtaking these will be with you and I all cleaned up.” Liam comments, with his arm around me.