Page 162 of Grand Love

His face screws up almost painfully. “You want to keep it from him?”

“Not just him.” My head tilts. “Mason would never forgive you, and that would hurt both of you enough, but Scarlet wouldn’t forgive you either.”

He starts to openly cry, breaking down where he stands as his secrets marinate between us. It has my brows drawing in as I fight to keep myself from going to him. “Nina, I don’t deserve her.”

I shrug. “Maybe not, but Scar’s the only person who gets to decide that. Telling them won’t change this, Lance. It only brings it all back, for us all.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Go home,” I tell him, layering it with all the conviction I can scrape from the depths of me. “You’ve made a lot of mistakes. We all have. But don’t let her be one of them.”

His nostrils flare as he steps up to me. His head shakes with fear, gratitude, reluctance—I don’t know, but I let him pull me into him. Amongst the anger, pain and uncertainty I feel inside of me, I know that this man loves the very same people I do. He wouldn’t act out of malice—not towards them. It’s a fierce thing, love. It’s dangerous. I’ve hurt Mason so many times. Every time I’ve run, every time I’ve found annoyance in his giving, and each and every time I didn’t believe him. I don’t deserve his love any more than Lance because I left him. I made a mistake far more detrimental than Lance’s. I did what I never dreamed I’d do. I walked away from my family.

Maybe I don’t deserve his love at all.

“You’re more than he could ever wish for. You came along right when he needed you and I’m sorry I didn’t see that.”

Lance leaves and I dispose of the files, burning them out on the balcony and washing the remnants away once I’m finished. Then I do all I can to damage the USB before putting it in the bin.

* * *

Mason walksthrough the door not an hour after our phone call, yet it feels like days—a lifetime. I smile despite the unease I feel and stand from the sofa to take the changing bag from him. Ellis is asleep in his arms, and he whispers with a frown, “I’m going to take him up.”

I nod my head, watching as he disappears up the stairs.

I have to do this.

It’s better for everyone.

Mason finds me in the kitchen once he has Ellis settled in his bed. His face is full of concern as he walks towards me. “What is it, Angel?” I wrap myself in him the second I can reach him, and he holds me, his hands slipping under my T-shirt so he can run his hands up my back. “Nina.”

“I’m sorry,” I tell him.

“Sorry for what?” he says defensively, pulling away from me.

“I need you to promise me something—”

“Nina,” he grits out.

“Promise me that you will trust me enough to let this go. I know I don’t deserve it and I’ve not given you enough reason to… but I need you to know that I will let him go. Because I need this to work. You and Ellis are my only priority, and we have to make this work.” I rush out the words. My gaze locked on his.

“Who? Who will you let go?” he snaps, clearly confused.

“Joey.” I draw in a deep breath. “Promise me, Mase.”

He scowls down at me, his brows furrowing as his spine straightens. “What did he do?”

“He tried to kiss me.”

He doesn’t move. Doesn’t flinch. Doesn’t do anything. But inside I get the feeling that he’s at boiling point. “Mase, I would never have gone to his apartment if I knew he was in the state he was in, if I knew he’d come at me.” I grab his hand as I try to make him understand. “His brother died just a few days ago and I wanted to check in, that’s it. I won’t see him for a while. I’m telling you because this—we—mean so much more than what he did and I won’t let it set us back, not when I feel so damn close to having you again.”

“You said he tried to kiss you.”

I nod. “I’m so sorry for putting you in this position.”

He swallows thickly again, taking a rough breath in then scrubbing a hand over his mouth. “I’ll fucking kill him.”

“Mase.” I panic.

---