Page 163 of Grand Love

“I know!” he snaps, turning away from me and leaning against the kitchen island.

“I pushed him away. Nothing happened, and I left right away. I won’t go back to his again.”

“Did he hurt you?” His voice is sharp, deadly even.

“No.” I watch his back, wanting to reach out and touch him but not knowing how he’d react. “What are you going to do?” I ask.

He lifts his head, eying me over his shoulder. “Nothing.” He sniggers. “Not a damn thing.” There’s an instant relief that comes with his words, but also huge shock. I stand in wonder as to whether I’ve heard him correctly. “I’ve never doubted your faithfulness, Nina. I don’t like this, but I won’t let it come between us. We’re going to make this work this time. Me, you, Ellis.”

My chin wobbles and I try to stop it, covering my face with my hands. “I’m sorry.”

My tears break as his arms wrap around me. “Shh,” he soothes, rubbing a hand over my back. “It’s okay.”

I breathe in a lungful of air, hoping it will stop the emotion that’s bubbling in my throat. I need my family, and if that means carrying Lance’s betrayal and taking a step away from Joey then that’s the price I pay.

“I didn’t know what you’d say. I thought you’d push me away.”

When he doesn’t say a word, I pull back so I can see him. After last night, I hate the thought of him not being himself with me.

“Mase.”

“Hmmm.” He stares down at me, his face hard and his body strung tight.

My hands smooth over his shoulders in the hope that it will relax him. “Thank you,” I tell him. “For not making this what it could have been. You have every right to be mad.”

“I’m not mad, at least not at you.” His eyes pinch in as he squeezes my hips. “I’m trying here, Nina.”

“I know, I can see that.” I smile gingerly up at him, my love for him growing to impossible levels as the seconds pass.

“Don’t,” he rasps out, dropping his forehead to mine.

“Don’t what?”

“That fucking smile.” His thumb dusts over my cheek.

“I love you, Mason Lowell,” I tell him, not blinking as I lean in and peck at his lips. He shuffles closer, his jaw clenching as if he’s fighting to keep his words to himself. “What is it?” I ask.

My body heats as his nostrils flare. His hand comes up to grip my chin, our lips all but touching. “I want to hurt him. I want to cause him pain.” I frown, hating myself for caring so much. “But more than that, I want to fuck you. I want the world to see me take you so that they know you’re mine, and that nobody else can have you.”

“You could just fuck me here so that I know,” I suggest, even though he has my pulse racing with his words.

He shakes his head no. “I’m mad at myself,” he states. “We aren’t doing this again.”

“Doing what?” I ask, concern lacing my voice as he steps away. His cheeks are flushed and I can very clearly see his erection straining behind his trousers.

“I’m serious about getting this right, Nina.” Reaching out, he smooths his hand over my cheek, then wraps it around my neck. His hands on me, possessing me in a way only he ever has. It brings me right back down to where I need to be. “I won’t sleep with you. It’s the only thing we’re good at. We need to learn to do everything else. I want to do this properly.”

“You. Mason Lowell… Do not want to have sex.” I blink. “Have I got that correct?”

“We are going to date instead.” He frowns as he says it as if the idea is only now coming to him. “No sex.”

“What?” I snap, a smile tugging on my lips. “Mase…” I reach out, palming his straining length through his trousers. “Have we not deprived ourselves for long enough?”

He growls deep in his throat, grinding his hips into my hand. The sound calls out to my wicked soul.

I squeeze him.

“Nina, I’m serious. I want to try it my way.” He steps away from me, his eyes heavy-lidded and tired. Probably due to the lack of sleep last night.

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