Page 77 of Belong With Me

“Your dad made you date for business?” God what kind of father was he?

“He had aspirations for me that I didn’t really want to be a part of. I was always set up with some lawyer or politician, or one CEO or another. I tried when I was in Harvard to branch out. But that was a dead end.”

I topped up her wine glass then gathered the plates. My mind boggled at the fact I’d been her first real date as I rinsed the dishes in the sink then stacked them in the dishwasher. A smile pulled at my lips as I grabbed a beer from the fridge and twisted off the top She stood beside the bench and slipped her arm through mine as we headed to the living room. When we were sitting closely side by side on the couch, my hand settled on the bare skin just above her knee, and I smoothed my thumb back and forth. Her skin warmed under my touch; the sense of ownership I felt over Sienna was something I hadn’t experienced before. Not even with Anna-Beth.

Although, I had loved her dearly, and the five years together with her were very enjoyable. I had asked her to marry me, and I always assumed we would be married and have two kids by now.

I wanted children. The need in me to be a father had been there for years. But unless I was to find the right person, I would remain only an uncle to Wyatt’s daughter, Aria.

Thinking about my brother and his daughter had me wondering about Sin, and wanting to know about her family. “So, you know, we’ve spent so much time together but I’ve never really asked. Do you have siblings of your own, Sin?”

She shook her head. “I’m an only child. It’s not so bad, but it gets lonely. I love the chaos of a big family, like yours. I’ve always wanted at least three kids.”

My heart swelled. The fact that she wanted the same things as me made me feel even more confident in us. In the future we could have together. The need to tell her couldn’t be contained. “Kids are always on the cards, I love them. I love being an uncle to Aria, but there’s just something about having some of my own that I want.”

“I’d love them so much.” Her voice was starting to rise and fall, and she moved her hands a lot more. I wondered if the alcohol was beginning to take effect. “Like so much. I’d read to them every night, and we’d play with toy cars or dress up as princesses or whatever. I wouldn’t make them sit straight at dinner.” She turned to me and looked me dead in the eye. “And I most certainly wouldn’t make them take ballet, then forget about them while I was at a meeting. Or do equestrian riding, but miss their show days.” She nodded as if affirming her own thoughts. “God, I hated that.”

“Wait, your parents did that to you?” She couldn’t be serious.

She pouted and I saw her eyes shuttering. She didn’t mean to reveal that to me. I thought she was about to shut down, but instead she surprised me. “Well. I haven’t done ballet since I was twelve, and my mother decided to sell my horse Flash Jack because it wasn’t a lady-like thing to have horsehair on her at any time.”

I opened my mouth to reply, but I didn’t get the chance.

“But I’m my own person, Ryder Larsen.” Her words were heavier, and she looked like she was concentrating hard on getting her words out. “Only I can decide what I want to do and who I want to be.” I cradled a hand on her cheek, but quickly shot a look to the kitchen bench, where the now almost empty bottle of wine sat.

Apparently, I’d been a bit heavy handed with my drink pouring skills. Guilt washed over me. I didn’t want to cut this short, certainly not when she was opening up to me. But the woman was in clear need of a bed. “C’mon, let’s head to bed.”

It was as if she didn’t hear me as I stood and offered her a hand to take her upstairs. She continued her tangent as though nothing at all had been said.

“I don’t have to do what he says.” Then added as her eyebrows creased, “I don’t have to do what you say either.”

Her comment hit me in the stomach, I knew she didn’t mean it, but still, “No, Sienna, you don’t,” I told her, tugging her gently toward the stairs, “but you might hate me if I let you sleep on the couch with no underwear on.”

The thought of Colton coming in tonight and catching a glimpse of what she hid beneath that sundress had me inhaling a few deep breaths.

She giggled a little. “Surprise! I thought you might like that.”

“I do like it. I like it a lot,” I assured her as we negotiated the stairs to the upper floor.

“I like you,” she added quietly. “You make me feel good. Like when I laugh.”

I opened her bedroom door, and gently directed her toward the bed. “I’m glad. I like you too.”

I helped her to sit down. She remained quiet for a moment. I took the seat next to her and waited to see if she would say anything further.

“You know, it wasn’t supposed to be like this,” she slurred.

“Like what?” I asked curiously.

“Like this.” One hand flicked back and forth between where we sat on the edge of the bed.

“Like us, you mean?” I asked, my heart lurching at what she might have running through her head. I claimed her last night. She agreed she was mine. Just what was she thinking to be looking so worried?

“Yeah.” She paused. “And no. “

Well, that was as clear as mud. I wanted to lean in and shake her; it didn’t help that she had drunk nearly an entire bottle of wine tonight. “What do you mean, Sienna?”

Those pale blue eyes of hers rose from where she was drawing circles on the quilt, to meet my eyes. “You and me. It was never supposed to be real.”

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