Page 56 of Rock and a Hard Place

Chapter 29

Lillian

“I’mdisappointedweweren’table to change your mind, but I understand now that we went about everything the wrong way. Not just now, but from the very moment we knew of your existence. And for that, I’m truly sorry.” Dr. Shen sounded and looked genuinely regretful over the video call.

Something about the way Dr. Shen spoke to me had changed since we met. He seemed warming, more friendly. It was odd, and I didn’t really trust it, but I wasn’t going to question a good thing.

“Snow leopard shifters, more so than many other shifter cultures, are secretive and keep mostly to ourselves,” he continued. “It served us well in the past when we were targeted by various groups for our differences. We were able to prosper and grow rich. But the world is changing, and we find ourselves at a crossroad of sorts. The Wall falling has had a lot to do with that.”

I nodded. “Technology and magic, too. It’s impossible to hide now.”

“Yes.” The older man paused, picking his words carefully. “I realize now that we must embrace all our members, even the ones who are unable to shift, the ones born abroad, or with mixed blood. If we don’t, we may die out. What is the point of all this wealth when our numbers are dwindling, and there are no children to pass it down to?”

“I’m sorry. And I hope you find a way to save your species.”

“It’s your species too, Lillian. You are half snow leopard shifter, and that is a lot more than many others.”

I couldn’t stop the derisive scoff that tumbled out.

He nodded. “Yes, I understand we haven’t done anything to make you feel particularly welcome. We didn’t know about you until your adoptive parents contacted us. We had no idea who you were, or whether you were actually a snow leopard, or just another cat shifter.” He sighed audibly. “It took us years to confirm who you were. Records were…lacking. By the time we did, you’d already grown up. I hope you can one day forgive the way we’ve treated you in the past. We don’t have packs like some canine shifters do, but we do have customs and traditions that are passed down through the generations. Not being able to shift has always been hugely shameful, but maybe it’s time for old ideas like that to go.”

I thought back to my failed relationships. “That’s going to be hard. Even with other shifters, it’s very important. Running together as a family when the moon is full is a tradition.” A tradition I could never participate in.

“Then we must lead the way. I may not have been successful in completing my mission here in Darlington, but I’ve had a lot of time to rethink this entire project. Lillian, I…” It sounded like he wanted to say something more to me but he stopped himself. “It was nice to meet you. Thank you for agreeing to speak with me over video chat so I could see your face again. I’m boarding my plane now, but you have my number. Please feel free to use it for whatever reason.”

I thanked him, even though I highly doubted I’d need to call him, and said goodbye.

So that solved itself faster and better than I ever thought possible. I had a feeling Kevin coming out publicly about his relationship with Sofiya had put the final nail in that coffin. He was most likely the only single male candidate they had that could’ve gone up against Gunnar on paper; everyone else was married.

I sent a recording of the conversation to the rest of the penthouse, an easy task since I had made the video call using the Redrock tablet. The general consensus was that The White Claws were no longer a worry for me, though I should keep up the ruse of being married for as long as possible. It wasn’t like I had anywhere else to go. My apartment was gone, and I was still technically jobless, though if you asked Shelby, she’d probably say I was a budding entrepreneur.

I looked around my temporary room. I’d moved everything except my plants into one of the spare rooms in the main area, mostly because I needed to be away from all the things that reminded me of Gunnar while I was trying to calm down. I didn’t want to claw up anything of value and regret it later.

Our argument had been two days ago, and he still hadn’t returned. I’d wanted some time alone, but not this much. Now I was worried perhaps he was done with me.

When Tansy and I had gotten home, my mittens had gotten the biggest workout of their fuzzy lives. Tansy and Shelby had brought over all the things they wanted to get rid of, and I’d only fucked up one good pillow, which I’d replaced.

We’d had a girl’s night dinner of wine and ice cream. Apparently, Shelby always kept Ben and Jerry’s on hand just in case. She’d told me how Grayson had accidentally implied once that he needed to pay for her things because she was sleeping with him, and how cross she’d gotten with him. But he hadn’t meant it in a bad way.

It was just that gargoyles came from a time when men were expected to be the breadwinners, and a man’s worth was determined by how well he provided for his mate. This was especially true in the more well-to-do levels of society. If your wife needed to work, it meant you weren’t doing a good enough job taking care of her.

Apparently, Gunnar told Eamon he was prepared to offer me twice as much as Kevin had…or should I say twice as much as hethoughtKevin had…to keep from losing me. A huge part of me hated that he felt money was even something I cared about, but at the same time, knowing that he was willing to do anything to keep me around was…well, it was nice.

But then I’d freaked out on him, and he hadn’t been back since. Was he waiting for me to call him?

I picked up my phone again, my fingers itching to send him a message.

Oh, what the heck. It wasn’t like anything about our relationship was normal to begin with. I wrote a short message telling him I wanted to talk. The message stared back at me, mocking me from my screen.

I should send it. Get the ball rolling. Extend that olive branch. But I wimped out. What if he didn’t reply? I was too chicken shit; I erased it without hitting send.

Argh! Why was I like this? I could think perfectly fine until love had anything to do with it, and then my brain turned into a pile of mush—

Love? Holy shit, was I in love?

How did that happen? I shoved my phone deep into my purse and stomped out of my room so I wouldn’t be tempted to check it every thirty seconds.

I went to my espresso machine, which I’d set up in the main kitchen, only to discover that I’d run out of my favorite beans. Well, now that I didn’t have a secret organization with ties to organized crime after me, I could actually get out of the house and go buy some more.

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